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[Teabay]

Hi, this is a message to all of you who are worried about leaving a partner who makes you unhappy and is abusing your lovely nature. You don't want to be a single parent, you think your kids will suffer etc etc - hear this - IT'S JUST NOT TRUE!

Right now I'm in MY kitchen, it's raining, cold etc BUT me and DC are warm and safe. The washer's on, I'm peeling spuds, one DC doing homework, one playing, and life feels so unbelievably sweet - 18 months ago I never believed I could be here and it would feel so okay.

Don't think it will harm your DC - it harms them by staying. Mine are, in fact, flourishing!

You can all do this! Thank you to all the lovely people on here who posted to help me over the last two years when life was impossibly hard and I cried EVERY day - I needed you, and you were there.
Best wishes to everyone this year!

That’s really lovely to hear, well done!

I’m 5 years down the same road as you and have got engaged to a wonderful man. I’m so pleased that I walked away.

Awww happy days to you and your family.

It is lovely to read a positive message.

Teabay lovely post. Best wishes for 2018.

I'm 2 years post split. My exH is still mean but my DCs and I are overall ok and I have been seeing someone for a few months.

So I agree it's better to get out!

Well done and what a lovely message.

And as a child who was in this situation I can wholeheartedly agree.

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Well done Tea. You've certainly got your priorities sorted out. Hope your post gives strength to others who may be struggling..

Well done Tea - you've certainly got your priorities sorted. Hope your post gives strength to others who may be struggling.

Well done Tea - you've certainly got your priorities sorted. Hope your post gives strength to others who may be struggling.

Didn't quite catch that saltandvinegar

Just as well you made me smile as I seemed to have something in my eye.

This is lovely to hear OP.

Thank you for sharing - is so encouraging 💐

I never thought when posting yesterday that people would comment and be encouraged, but yes, there is a lot of hurt on this board at the moment.
I suppose when I was struggling I wanted to read a post saying it will be ok - I'm so happy that after a year or so I've been able to post my own!

This is a ray of sunshine to me as I have been struggling for a very long time. I have been lurking and posting on a few threads but have kept relatively quiet about my situation. Against my better judgement I came back to the abusive relationship after leaving with DC only a week ago. I feel like a fool, something horrible happened this morning and I’m ashamed of myself for coming back and allowing it to happen to me, I need to find the courage for it to be over for good, thank you for giving me hope op

Well done teabay!

I feel the same, almost 12 months out. Just cooking for a friend who is about to come over, single male one at that!

Dance to the beat - you're definitely NOT a fool, you're possibly just a lovely person trying to make it all right for everyone else. But you're forgetting about you!
IME having a few false starts leaves puts you in a better place when you're fully gone. You've eliminated all the "what ifs" and you'll feel in your bones that there was no other way for you. That's okay, and quite legitimate.

Best of luck

Love this! I left exh 5 years ago. We have 2 dc. He was violent and emotionally abusive. Took me 2 years to get the strength to leave. My dc are doing incredible. They are well behaved, good manners, doing well at school. Not seen exh for nearly 5 years. I'm now with am amazing man who is bringing up my children as his own and we just had a baby together. My life and heart are full to bursting.

Well done!!!

Same here..... 8 years ago my ex husband left me for another woman after four children and 13 years together.

I went on to meet someone else, get engaged and have two more children. But he actually turned out to be emotionally abusive and I ended up kicking him out after a particular incident.

Two years on from that and everything is super rosy! No new man, though I have dated a couple of times. But I'm Happy !

Lovely to hear these good stories - we can do it!