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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Trying to mess with my head?

7 replies

ShimmerAndShite · 13/01/2018 12:37

My confidence is being eroded daily. I can't work out some of his behaviour and I'm feeling like I'm crap at everything.

He got home with our youngest, I was doing something with our eldest. Little one was crying and he said she needed a sleep so I said I would take her for a walk. I asked him what she had eaten that morning and he said not a lot that's why I'm making her lunch. She was crying and he had a go at me for not taking her out for a sleep, I said that he had just said he was making her lunch so I was planning on taking her out after. He had a go saying she'll never eat when she's like this, take her out now. I went to the toilet and started getting ready to go, he had a go at me for not supervising her while she ate the food he has given her for her lunch.

What the fuck?

Seriously I'm a stay at home mum and deal with everything during the week, at weekends dont feel like i can do anything.

I want to leave but worry I'll lose my children as he'll make out I'm a terrible mum. Now I doubt myself, is he a controlling abusive arsehole, or does he need to be because I'm shit. I'm so confused.

OP posts:
pog100 · 13/01/2018 12:53

If you cope with them all week then it is patently obvious you are fine, skilled and a good mother. If it all goes to shit when he is around, what do you think that says ... that he is the problem. You already feel you would be better to leave, I would encourage you to do it.

category12 · 13/01/2018 12:57

You won't lose your children on his say so. It's bullshit to keep you down.

category12 · 13/01/2018 12:57

You won't lose your children on his say so. It's bullshit to keep you down.

ShimmerAndShite · 13/01/2018 13:57

No but I can pretty much guarantee that he will quit his job and go for full custody. Everyone that meets him say what a great dad he is so if he convinces them I'm not a good parent I worry he might get them

OP posts:
BendyLikeBeckham · 13/01/2018 13:59

fuck that OP. threats to take kids are in the abuse bible that all a shit heads like him read. it won't happen. it is a way of controlling you.

LTB. seriously.

ShimmerAndShite · 13/01/2018 14:03

He has never actually said it as he doesn't believe I would ever leave him. I know he would leave his job though as he has just come into some money and hates his job.

OP posts:
beyondthesky · 13/01/2018 14:26

Well if he come into money he will still be obliged to support you.

Don't allow him to make you feel you're a crap mother. If you're unhappy tell him.

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