How do others navigate relationship during perimenopause?

[idpreferanegroni]

Just that really. I'm in my 40s, my hormones are up, down, flying in all directions. Sometimes I feel quite blank. But then other times, I feel that intensity of feeling. And boy does it not feel right. Years of tolerating, not demanding enough etc I keep wondering 'where is dp's empathy?' 'desire?' 'Does he ever prioritise me over work?'
And I feel angry. Which I no longer want to apologise for. Feeling it that is.
Is co-parents who watch tv together enough?
Are there others out there with similar thoughts/feelings which are stressed via hormones? Do your dp's dig their heels in and want you back to 30s self? Or change themselves for the better?

@MissWilmottsGhost I don't think there is anything wrong with my hormones. They are completely normal for a 52 year old, post menopausal woman. However, they are different than they used to be and since our hormones impact our emotions and moods, there is a shift in how I feel and how I respond to things. Actually, I think I like my hormones more now than previously, as they seem to be on my side!

There are problems in my relationship. That being true doesn't change the fact that my hormones have shifted massively, and that shift impacts how I feel about my relationship.

@freshstart24 Congratulations on your new marriage! Hopefully, since you married more recently and with more maturity, you are in a better relationship going into this phase than some of us were. My best friend IRL is sailing through it with no real issues, so I don't think it is a given than ALL women will go through upheaval.

@Branleuse Have you considered hormone replacement therapy? I did it for a year when my levels were bouncing around all over the place and I was in misery. I didn't want to stay on HRT long term due to possible health risk, but after looking into it I decided 1 year was safe. It really helped to have a more stable level.

@idpreferanegroni My views on marriage counseling aren't advice. The way I feel doesn't seem sensible to me. I would think that I would be happy he wanted to go to counseling and work on the relationship, but it just annoys me. I think that I worked at the relationship for so long that I'm just done working at it.

I want us to have fun together, or go through the trauma of a divorce and be done with it. One or the other.

But this isn't advice. I don't think it is a sensible way to be at all. My DH is now working at the relationship and trying to do things I want to do, which is great. But a marriage isn't a game, and it could easily go the other way.