After a long (decades) unhappy relationship with my ea brother in law I finally ‘unfriended’ my sister on fb. It was due to me having tried to support/defend/interfered years ago when he was abusive to my sister and then small child.
I’d been a support to her, helped when she was distressed, provided all of her childcare , financially bailed them out etc but I couldn’t turn a blind eye to him so each time I stood up for her or myself he would ‘punish’ me (his words) in some way.
We tried to reconcile several times but he’s been continually abusivr to me ever since.
Most recently was a year ago where I said I’d had enough and told her to contact me if she wants to but I’m not making overtures anymore as it was stressful upsetting and embarrassing (he would also publicly humiliate me in various ways)
Since then she kept putting up pa posts clearly aimed at me. I’d kept looking at her profile as she’s my sister and her kids are on there etc but after months of this and her ignoring me I ended up unfriending her and after sending her a birthday message she blocked me altogether.
Most of our family have been cut off by her.
She and her kids don’t acknowledge cards, presents etc and my kids birthdays are not acknowledged.
I’ve since found out through friends and family that she’s pregnant (quite far gone). I was birth partner for her other kids and I know how hard she’s tried for this baby so I’m genuinely pleased for her and sad I won’t be involved but I don’t expect to be involved and certainly won’t try.
Knowing her if I don’t acknowledge it she’ll use it as further reason to keep me cut off and if I do acknowledge it she’ll probably ignore me and I’ll feel like a stalker...
I’m tempted to send a letter congratulating and brief explanation of why I unfriended her.
Should I bother ? What would you do?
What should I do? Please help!