Had a lightbulb moment yesterday...or maybe I'm being too sensitive or miserable.
Silly thing really but I put some sweets on my spot on the sofa, went to kitchen to make cup of tea and returned to find them gone. I asked dh and dd that were in the room where they had gone and both said didn't know what talking about. I did wonder if I had taken them to kitchen with me briefly, then thought someone's playing a practical joke so ignored it and said nothing more. Dh got up to put Xmas decs boxes in attic which I said I would help with once finished tea, other dd came along and found sweets on his sofa.
So I mentioned to him when he came back that he had been rumbled but his response troubled me. He said he took them to make me think I was going mad and was going to give them back after I did what I had said and helped with decs.
I have stage 4 cancer and recently asked Dr if I could fly so we could have some winter sun during Feb half term. He wanted to wait till have a scan by which time too late to book (spread to lungs so pressure on flight a worry). I broached subject with dh saying it is a possibility may not be able to fly abroad again and he might have to take kids (all teens) on his own and have second hole here with me. His response aside from it won't be the same was "why? you trying to get rid of us for your other man". This constant suggestion of me having an affair was one thing that was brought up in relate last year and until recently he hasn't said it.
He says things "jokingly" which I dont find funny and feel attacked...but apparently I've no sense of humour and he huffily says I wont say anything in future.
Is this gaslighting or me being miserable because am dealing with a lot at the moment?