is this sweet or weird?

[pinaaacolda]

me and exP have been working towards getting back together recently. We were meant to meet today in his lunch hour but he is off work really ill with chest infection. He rang me and he is going docs this morning and then resting today. He wants to rearrange for Sunday.

Anyways, I'm seeing my friend who lives in the same area as him this afternoon. I'm thinking of dropping him off some food/comforts after I have been. He knows my friend lives in that area and so it wouldn't be seen as me going out of my way to be there. I would literally just drop things off, give him a hug and leave.

Should I let him know before i pop round with things?

I think it's sweet but I'm crap at relationships and usually do things like this and it puts folk (men) off.
If you are worried that it might make him think you're a bit full on, you probably shouldn't do it, though!
But I would do it as I have zero self control. Haha!
Sorry this is pretty unhelpful advice!

No. I would see him as prearranged between you on Sunday.

I would further consider why you and he parted in the first instance; those problems likely remain.

I wouldn't drop in without permission. It's fussing, and he might really be feeling and looking like shite. I wouldn't like it.

I personally wouldn't as the reconciliation is still at an early stage and wouldn't want to be seen as trying to mother him or invade his personal space/overstep boundaries.

Certainly when I'm ill, I just want to be left alone and will rejoin the world when I'm fully functioning again.

You know the guy best OP, just be honest with yourself about your intentions in surprising him at his place; is there any element of wanting to check out his story/make sure he really is where he says he is?

Please feel free to disregard if none of this is relevant to you, it's just my innate cynicism and how I'd reason it out to myself in the same situation.

it's just some things he was saying last night about how when he's ill he thinks about us a lot and its horrible being on his own when he feels like that.

I'm not checking up on him tbh, i've no reason to suspect him.

Broke up because of distance - now i am back

it would literally be a knock on the door and a drop off of things - i think i would like it if i was ill. He likes being mothered when ill. Just not sure if im "allowed" to as his ex.

Drop him a text, ask if he would like you to drop anything over to him as you are passing his area at whatever time on your way to visit a friend.

He will answer yes please or no I’m ok thanks

If I'm really ill, i don't want to see anyone! Text first!

I think just tell him you're in the area and ask him if he needs anything. It shows you care but it's up to him to decide if he needs anything.

Yes just ask him! I absolutely hate people turning up unannounced at mine, especially when ill!!

Text first. He might really want someone to come round with juice. He might be coughing like mad and trying to rest and not want to be disturbed.

Text first, just in case he wants to have a tidy round, make himself more presentable, etc. I wouldn't just turn up.

I think it's fine, if you text first. I hope he mothers you when you're sick too.

I would leave it outside his door and text him that the things are there

I wouldn't knock

I'd leave the stuff outside his door and text him. Someone did that for me once and I thought it was so sweet

I’d text and say I’m going to be close by and does he need any lemsip? And no hugs - the man is a germ factory!

Weird without warning, sweet if you text to ask if he needs anything.

I agree with leaving it outside the door. It's a sweet gesture with no presssure to see you when he is ill.