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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Ongoing feelings of anger

12 replies

southernharp · 03/01/2018 22:28

How can I stop these feelings directed towards my ex and the ow. It is so exhausting.
Short back story. H left 18 months ago after 25 year relationship. Unhappy. Ow appeared not long after. A friend of mine. Just a friend to him and a support apparently. Went on lh holiday together. Always around the kids. Apparently 'in love' now and I have to 'accept it'.
I absolutely detest them and thoroughly dislike all who give them the time of day. She won't even meet my eye and scuttles away if we are ever in the same vicinity. I have had to be quite straight with a number of mutual friends that their acceptance of them as a couple actually condones what they have done and sadly, I cannot live with that.
I do have an active life of my own - 2 jobs, friends I can trust, hobbies, creative pastimes, I work for a charity too. But the fury is always there. So how do I achieve closure?

OP posts:
LineysRumBaba · 03/01/2018 22:31

I honestly think it's time that helps. And detachment.

southernharp · 03/01/2018 22:33

How long? Desperate about these feelings!

OP posts:
LineysRumBaba · 03/01/2018 22:45

Couple of years, tbh.

Do you have to be in their vicinity? I'd avoid them completely.

Let him and the DC organise their own relationships if they're old enough (13+) . I really, really detached in the end.

southernharp · 03/01/2018 23:01

Kids are 11. And he treats them like babies. Constant friction over this. I currently live in the same village but I have a new job now and I am trying to move away. He is blocking the house sale making it hard for me to move cos the kids will come with me and that makes his life a little less convenient. Part of me is raging that I have to move away and start again - it's not me who had an affair. Feel like I have been driven out not necessarily on my own terms. I try not to see the , but the thought makes me rage.

OP posts:
LineysRumBaba · 03/01/2018 23:33

He can't stop a divorce happening. Have you got a very good solicitor?

sunseasand25 · 03/01/2018 23:44

In the short term could you do boxercise as a practical way of channelling your anger? Or even punching some cushions. I also think it just mostly takes some time. Also the people that appear to be condoning it probably have their own opinions of him and their cliche of a relationship. I think some people struggle to understand the feelings involved when they aren’t actually in the situation themselves. I totally empathise though. I get very angry and feel betrayed when people don’t seem to get it. Flowers

Brandnewstart · 03/01/2018 23:48

Oh god, I'm three years on and still raging some days. I accept it (the anger) and run a lot to help my MH. I would like to be at a point where I could be civil to her but I don't think it will come. My boss is 20 years on and still gets upset. I think it's ok to acknowledge the feelings but I try very hard to be nice about her to my children. I don't want them to be fucked up by my anger towards her!

MelonKnee · 04/01/2018 00:30

southernharp and Brandnewstart

Go and download this:

pstec.org/

It's free and it's simply very effective in releasing any strong emotion that you feel stuck with. Comes with instructions and the process is guided (about 10 mins) so you can't do it wrong.

Brandnewstart · 04/01/2018 00:44

Thanks melon

southernharp · 04/01/2018 00:58

Thanks Melon

OP posts:
MelonKnee · 04/01/2018 01:22

You're welcome. I'm going to sleep now but I'm free most of tomorrow if you have any questions about it after trying it. Run it through a couple of times and see how you feel. Flowers

ravenmum · 04/01/2018 08:24

I started out with counselling, thought not just about the affair, more about the feelings of low self-worth that it triggered in me. That was really useful, though. But really, as others have said, it has just taken time. Three and a half years for me now and I still have the odd moment of rage when he reminds me of what a twat he was, but it has just got less and less frequent, very gradually.

I think one reason the counselling was good is that it gave me the idea that in fact the breakup could improve my life in many ways. And after this time I do still feel like it was a turning point which has left my life richer and more "real" as I now take less shit from people, have got over some of my hangups through counselling and treatment for depression, and am thus more active about going out and doing things, making friends etc. And I realise that the relationship with my ex was quite restrictive in many ways and I now have new opportunities. I also don't see the OW as having come out on top; in fact I feel sorry for her as she is bound to have the same problems with my ex if they have children.

My lovely dad has Aspergers and met up with my ex last time he was here "because he missed him", and because he does not understand what he did. As far as I can tell he thinks I just misread the situation and imagined the affair, when actually I had firm evidence for my ex going to a sex hotel, on holidays, dissing me and the kids, etc. I'm learning that you can't make other people see things your way, and the frustration at that is gradually waning.

It sounds like you don't see any silver lining, which is bound to make the anger last longer. Are there any positive aspects to him no longer being there? Anything you've always wanted to do, and can now do?

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