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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Help needed for my son who is going through awful break-up

3 replies

Yogibear65 · 02/01/2018 12:01

My son has split from his partner of 5/6 years, they have a 4 year old child who i will call Jake. Their relationship has been very toxic for many years and frankly the split was the best thing for them in my opinion. They have spent years rowing often infront of their son which i dont condone. Their relationship has been off and on for years and finally my son put a stop to it as he could see how much damage was being done to Jake.
His partner i will call her Jane cannot be reasoned with and is making things quite impossible for my son. He sees Jake every weekend, pays maintenance and helps with babysitting if needed when asked but nothing is enough. Jane will tell Jake his daddy doesnt love him and that he is a bad dad and continually says awful things about my son in front of Jake. Jake is now confused and doesnt want to stay with my son because of these awful things he is being told.
Jane found a new relationship quickly after they split and my son was ok with this as Jake likes Mummys new friend. My son has recently started a new relationship which has made Jane very angry.
I am really asking for help for my son to cope, he is very upset as Jake is now saying he doesnt want to spend time with his dad, which is simply down to what he is being fed by Jane. How can I help my son get through this, can anything be done to stop Jane saying these terrible things about him? Jane is constantly threatening my son with not seeing Jake, she uses Jake as a bargaining chip to get her own way.
Any help of advice would be great as i really dont know how to help him. Thank you

OP posts:
Louiseandthreepink · 02/01/2018 12:06

I really do not know what I can possibly say in the way of advice. Other than maybe try and see if your son and "Jane" can sit down and have a very amicable chat about things in a mutual place. Such as coffee shop. But from the sounds of it, she sounds unreasonable and not the type of person who would be up for that.

I really hope your sons situation gets better. I really do.

hellsbellsmelons · 02/01/2018 12:24

Would he get support from an organisation?
MANKIND maybe a good place to start.
See what they say and take it from there.
I hate women like this.
I was royally screwed over but I wouldn't allow a bad word to be said about her DDad in front of her.

Yogibear65 · 02/01/2018 12:52

Thank you for responding, I'm afraid Jane cannot be reasoned with. Thank you for your support it helps.

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