I have been in a committed relationship with white man since Sept of 2016. I am a black female. In the beginning of the relationship, it was good like how everything is at the beginning stages. Felt new and exciting. We have never had sex but flirted very close. Since December 2016 nothing. And nothing means no flirty activity for over a year and we are in the 30s. I have tried everything, reading to understand, GNC testosterone, no expectations, date nights, new hair clothes, working out to make myself feel more confident, talking, writing letters to communicate without mean tones or miscommunication. When he will open up enough to talk, I am told he will try and he will change. He then proceeds without one inch of trying. I understand, Rome wasn't built in a day but I do want to build a family (he has said he does too) and even though I am told every day I am loved there is NO intimacy. Only sports all day and work. I feel so hurt and alone. I have cried to him and I feel like a fool. Am I? Does someone really love when there is no cuddling, there is pop kissing but that's it. Nothing for birthday, Valentines day and nothing again for New Years. He will sometimes state lets have a romantic evening out but it never happens, whether its work, sports or finances. I ask if there is someone else and I am advised he loves only me. I did look on his pc one evening and saw that he looks for nude blondes online and likes to watch strippers. His last woman was a dancer even though he claims he found out after they were together. Is this worth working on? I am a black female and this man seems to be attracted to something else. I have told him that maybe he wanted to try dating outside his race but its not what he really wants. How can it be? How can a man never want a woman they say they love? How can you build a family ? Its a New Year and I am tired of feeling hurt and ugly. I am tired of going out and not holding his attention, only to come home to coldness. He is a very nice person, learns waitress names. Almost annoying that he goes above and beyond to be so nice to people and doesn't take the time to see a treasure. Just need outside advice, I want a family . I am willing to work on the relationship and myself.