I think my OH has some of these symptoms - reading through articles on marriages with one partner with it and the other one being a "critical parent" felt like someone had been taking detailed notes on my 28 year relationship. My husband has many of the characteristics and the jump out ones are high impulsivity, stupid decisions which are often selfish and impact others negatively - but he does not see it that way - chaotic / messy - tends to be dog with squirrel in terms of attention span. Creative / energetic too but really hard work to live with due to the above. Came to this thought as adult son who has struggled has been assessed for Aspergers and not given that diagnosis but has been recommended for review for ADD - reading up on it made me look at my relationship. Every few weeks he does something stupid that hurts me - latest one being commissioning a piece of jewelry for a work colleague who is moving on at £150 without discussing it with me. I got a £40 wildlife camera for my Xmas and thought the jewelry was the other part of my present. A real Emma Thompson Love Actually moment - apart from the fact that they are not having an affair. She has a bf. He just does stupid impulsive things. Like me being 1 week out of hospital for neurosurgery on my neck and he is working away for 2 days and nights and does not call to see how i am - and then spends the 3rd day on site as he thinks he is going to get a ride in a helicopter - in radio silence. He works for himself so can My nurse friend so worried about me as had been v ill recovering she stayed over. He does not get it in these situations that the behaviour is odd - he just does dog-squirrel - if you have seen Up you will know the reference. Can be thoughtful and kind but when theres a squirrel distraction heaven help me. I take anti depressants, see a counsellor and have learned not to get angry as it clouds the situation. Beginning to wonder if counsellor is going to get a PhD or a blockbuster book out of the tales I bring to her. I have had 5 operations in 4 years which have stopped me working and a son to have to support - in case you were going to ask...