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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Could he have anxiety?

5 replies

chocsandtwirls · 28/12/2017 10:37

So i've been with a guy for 4 months now. We have had an amazing time so far and we have had fun. We would always make jokes out of things and he would seem caring, kind, warm, loving, accepting that i have a DS too. Last week however things took a turn and he changed completely.

I first noticed a difference the night after his night out. He rang me to tell me he had dropped his phone during the afternoon and he was really annoyed about it.
The next day he said he felt weird and fed up with some small things. Said he wasn't getting as much sleep as he would like too. I was suppose to be seeing him the next day but i received a text that afternoon saying his mum had now informed him that has grandad had arranged a meal that he had to attend. I was obviously a bit sad but told him its fine go spend time with your family. He text me most of that night and said he was really gutted he didn't see me and felt he let me down. Again said he was getting fed up of some small things. I asked if that was me and he said no def not. That he was so sorry he had been bad with me recently and he would make it up to me.

The next day i asked if he was ok and he said he was slightly ok, was putting on nice clothes to cheer himself up. Seemed distant and not as chatty. So this is when i started worrying abit. I said to him if we weren't on the same page maybe we should leave things. He said what was i on about, now he didn't know how i felt. I explained i wanted to continue as we were the previous week. He agreed and said the same.

We were arranging to see each other in a few days and he again seemed distant. By this point my guard had flew up and i text him the next day to say lets just be friends. He replied ok any reason? I said i can tell when someone isn't interest, he replied i've just had an off week. Then he blocked me on everything. I cannot contact him to get an explanation.

I've been really upset because i really did like him. From the sounds of things hes said to me his mum sounds controlling. He does not cope very well with rejections because he ran away to another country when him and his ex finished a few years ago. I had a quick nose of his ex gf profile and it said something about if your ex has anxiety dont freak out and stick by them.

So from what i've said would be say this sounds like anxiety? Being fine 1 min but so different and down/sad the next?

OP posts:
MorningstarMoon · 28/12/2017 10:42

This exact story has been posted before. Sudden grandad arranging meal and putting nice clothes on to cheer himself up. The only different bit is it has anxiety in it. OP have you posted about this before under a different name?

RunRabbitRunRabbit · 28/12/2017 10:45

Why are you trying to armchair diagnose him?

You ended it because he became distant. He accepted the dumping and blocked you.

Why are you now stalking his ex on FB?! Step away. Step right back away from it all.

You chucked him. You have no right to phone calls demanding that he explain himself to you.

Wolfiefan · 28/12/2017 10:47

He blocked you.
Move on.

butterfly56 · 28/12/2017 10:54

He is not interested in a relationship with you at all.
You need to understand this and move on.

WunWun · 28/12/2017 10:59

Yeah, this exact story has been posted before.

To me it sounds like he met someone else on the night out or maybe had a fling and realised he didn't want to be in a relationship ship. Then instead of doikng the decent thing and just ending it he strung you along for a week and was off with you in the hope you'd get fed up and dump him. It worked and he was relieved and blocked you so he didn't have to speak about it anymore.

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