Why I don't do Christmas rant.....

[loulou987]

A little bit of background....Firstly I would like to say that I have a loving family & I have lots of friends. But this year I'm sick to the teeth of Christmas being rammed down my neck. I see my family & friends regularly, I am by no means lonely. My parents are people that keep themselves to themselves & they have never been the type of people to host a huge Christmas meal or anything. I lived at the other side of the UK for years so the tradition of me going to theirs for Christmas dinner didn't happen due to me living away. Since I've returned I've realised that I actually enjoy the quiet time to myself ( due to working hard ) & it's no biggie that I don't go there on Christmas Day. Like I said I see my parents probably more often than others do as we are a really close knit family. My parents are very laid back & if I prefer to spend the days over Christmas resting, they just leave me to it.

So there's the background.... let the rant begin!

I'm sick to death of work colleagues/ certain friends pushing their ' concerned ' look shit down my neck. I am a grown adult. I make my own decisions. If I say that I'm not doing anything over Christmas don't go giving me all the 😳 pretend bullshit concerned / you are weird look.

I just wish that people would mind their own business. A couple of friends I've actually had to lie to to get them off my case. I've had to lie & tell them that I have plans just to stop them inviting me places that I don't want to go to! I mean who wants to sit & have dinner with a total bunch of strangers.

I think Christmas is a load of bullshit. It's fake. It's too commercialised. People moaning about presents. People buying kids extortionate amounts of presents so then the kids just expect this every year. People going OTT with gifts. Grown adults whining that they feel worthless because they didn't get the gift they wanted.Not one person mentions the real meaning of Christmas ( Jesus being born ) people making out that it's a time for spending it with loved ones .... well if you love them that much make more of an effort to see these people like ALL YEAR ROUND! Or at least more often than once a year!

All over MN & social media people striving for that ' perfect day ' All the songs about white Christmas ffs... we haven't had a white Christmas in years! It's all fairytale!

Call me strange or whatever, but I just don't get it, it all makes me cringe a little if I'm honest.

I'm dreading going back to work, all the ' what did you get ' .... sadly I've decided to say that ' I went somewhere ' just to get folk off my back. Otherwise it will be all the ' oh poor you spending Christmas on your own ' bullshit. It was my choice. I was perfectly happy sat with my pet cuddled up enjoying the Christmas movies & peace & quiet that this time of year brings.

I'm by no means a horrible spiteful bitter person, I love seeing everyone happy at this time of year... it's all just too false & commercialised for me I'm afraid.

However I have reflected on my time alone & ive decided that next year I'm going to look into ploughing my efforts into making someone else's Christmas special - seeing as though I don't participate, I'm going to look into serving/ helping out at the homeless shelter next Christmas Day. Maybe that will be my first truly enjoyable Christmas as helping out less fortunate others on that day must be very rewarding.

I feel better now I've got all that off my chest : )

And please if someone says that they don't do Christmas.... and you believe you have no reason to be concerned ( which the people that know me should know that ) please just respect that persons wishes & stop interfering & looking at them like they are odd etc.

I am normally an outspoken person and I say what I think, but this year folk have really done my head in! I'm no charity case! Just leave me be!

And for those of you that did celebrate Christmas, I hope you had a lovely day, I had my much loved peace & quiet & like I said I love seeing other people happy, but all this OTT just isn't for me.

Thanks for reading.

Peace out 

Here bloody here,,,the OP has spake the words that so many fear to say for lest they be thought a joy sucker. In reality, Christmas is celebrated by Christians and has sod all to do with sales,buying shite,getting pished or feeding your face until you collapse like an idiot.

Too funny your little contribution was @TDHManchester ... I liked that.

Oh god i swear if I hear the words ' magical' I will spontaneously combust 😳

Magical to me is like going to Lapland or somewhere... only then would I be able to tolerate such extravagant use of the term 'magical'.

I'm far from being a joy sucker, I'm the life & soul of any party as all my friends say, but I just can't do this shit anymore. The OTT music about fecking white Christmas FFS ( fairytale ) all the Santa bullshit ( again, fairytale ) the buying presents to prove that persons worth. The " He got me an electric toothbrush WAAAAAAA " Count me out. No Thanks.

Maybe if I ever have kids I may change my views, but even then I would only treat them to a present or 2 & I would bring them up knowing the real meaning of Christmas.

I do however enjoy a good mince pie & an eggnog

Thank you for being so accepting of my views, that means a lot

And you others who shared your lovely low key days.... bravo... don't be bullied into changing x

Good for you OP, I applaud your post and so respect you wanting to do something for others.

I don't think it is just Christmas, people are generally obsessed with what other people are doing these days to the point where you feel you have to tell them something amazing, it's all 'where are you going on holiday?' and 'what are you doing this weekend?' or even worse if I have an afternoon off 'what are you doing this afternoon, anything nice' and I just want to say 'fuck off with your questions, I'm going home to clean up my shit tip of a house, put my bins out and cook tea'.

If you want an easier life, just lie to everyone about your Christmas plans . Tell your family you and spending it with friends and vice versa. Honesty isn’t always best .

Or go on holiday abroad .

If you want to help with a homeless shelter at Christmas you need to check this out well in advance.

Many homeless charities are not able to accommodate Volunteers just for one day - you will appreciate that it costs them time and money to carry out interviews, take up references, get Police checks and provide training. So often they can only afford to do this for people who are able to Volunteer regularly. But maybe you might consider doing this anyway ? Make the true meaning of Christmas last all year 😃

We only buy a few presents for DC and a few relatives, the tree and make sure that no-one is hungry. Watch telly and relax. I just can't be bothered with all this Christmas stress.

@loulou987

I was home alone all Christmas on the sofa ill and I had a fabulous time! I'm quite sociable but I've loved my solitude. It's like I unplugged from all the hysteria?

Full on Christmases are a thing of the past for me. I'm only annoyed it took me so long to go low key.
I was with immediate family but if circumstances meant I wasn't then I'd get some nice food in and watch my favourite films etc.
It's a day, a day that somehow has for many people mass expectations followed often by mass disappointments.

I spent Christmas with the cat. Folks don't live local and we all think the competitive Christmas thing is quite, quite mad. M&S made my dinner and the folks had bacon butties.
Lots of friends find it a bit odd, but after a couple of years of this have accepted it and gone off to stress about buttering carrots or plaiting sausages. I know full well some of them would love to do what we do but don't have the confidence.

Lie and get them off your back quicker. 'Quality time with my nearest and dearest' - that would be you, of course..

All I know is that I've done everything to make everyone else happy this year and it's ended with me feeling exhausted, unfulfilled and thoroughly glad it's over. I'd happily opt well out of the whole thing next year.

OP you said it so well.
I don't celebrate Xmas and the celebratory day we have in our family luckily hasn't turned so over indulgent. It's all about spending time together, preparing bakes and good food to eat and chilling. We also make it a habit to donate.

BUT we do this throughout the entire year and not just one day. Visiting family, donating whatever little or lot we have etc. The only difference is everyone tries to have the same day off so we can all be together.

I couldn't deal with the consumerism, the waste. It's sad. The supermarkets do a good job donating extra good, but why only Xmas? The same with people trying to be really caring towards the homeless and the huge effort for them needing to be around people on Xmas. Same for old people who shouldn't be alone on Xmas. I applaud the efforts and intentions but they shouldn't be alone throughout the year. There are so many of us, we could all give a little time each so they never feel the brunt.

There are a lot of positives. People being more cheery. More of this is needed though throughout the year.

And as for the day, I see a lot of women doing all the work! In our home my DH loves to cook and but although my family are open, if we joined his they would wrestle him to the ground before he ever lift a fork to help clean. It's nice just being able to stay home and do our own thing which is chill.

Insomni You can. There will be a lot of bitching and whining, dummies will be spat and sulks will be had, but you can say 'If you want Christmas this year, go ahead. I love you all dearly but I am no longer prepared to shoulder the responsibility for meeting everyone's expectations'.
The first time I did it was terrifying. You would think I had suggested having roast kitten as a starter. Three years on it's become the new normal.

This Christmas thing is all bollocks and I’m very glad to hear others don’t buy into it. I spent the day in my pjs. A friend of mine had every single member of her family over. Something like 25 of them!! Not my cup of tea at all. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve done it. I’ve hosted everybody else’s kids. Had 15 of them running like loonies around the house, destroying everything (bless their little cotton socks). I’ve waited on and served everybody’s every whim and spent hundreds of pounds doing it. Not anymore. My best xmas day now is to have total peace and quiet. Eat what and when I want. Watch what I want on the tv all day long. I go nowhere and please nobody apart from me. Plus remember that in other countries/cultures they don’t do this 25th December bollocks. Some do xmas eve. Some don’t do it at all so why feel pressured to do something on a day that not everybody in the works does? In the future when quizzed say “oh sorry, didn’t you realise my family are half German? We celebrate St Nick and don’t go xmas day in our culture” that will shut them up.

OP you are the best! Exactly how I feel about Christmas. So glad it's over.

I second the thanks loulou. I was wanting to start a thread saying the same but I was expecting to get flamed so didn't. I am quite brave in real life but a bit of a chicken online

Well said OP and credit to you! We have a very low-key Christmas, just me, DH and the grown up DCs. I haven't even put up a Christmas tree, DH and I agreed not to buy each other presents (though we buy for the DCs). Too much commercial pressure to spend and have "the best Christmas ever", and things are mad in the shops.
Not for us.

I have to admit, until a few years ago I really wanted to become the family matriarch with everyone coming to my house on either xmas eve, xmas day, or boxing day. Just like when I was a kid and we went to my Grandmas. My Grandma was the best ever and I miss her a lot, especially at Xmas.

5 years ago my ex-P decided to invite all his DC, and his GC to our place for xmas, and proposed to me on xmas day. We then split up in March! 🙄

I've now come to accept that xmas is what I make it, and in future years I'm sure my son will want to celebrate on his own with his future partner, and if that's the case I will be happy for him and just do my own thing on xmas day. Possibly involving giving my cat a stocking from Pets at Home which she'll probably ignore 😂

I agree with you OP, I can’t bear shitemas and how it’s forced upon us at every turn from September onwards, people obsessing over boring details and making things ‘magical’ for their screaming offspring and everyone eats the same thing on the same day. It’s a holiday for office workers and their Week Off, none of that is relevant or interesting to me so I opt out.
Don’t discuss any aspect of your life with people at work, they’re not your friends, talk about the customers/the work/the weather/inane drivel if you can bear it but offer no personal information, it will be remembered and whispered about and brought up over and over.

UPDATE..... Today is the 17 th January and I'm Still being asked ' if I had a nice Christmas' I mean who the fuck are these people? All the false fake fairytale bullshit ended like over 20 days ago! It's these type of nosey feckers that make me hate it so much. The people who are still asking ' did you have a nice Christmas' now surely are the ones who piss us all off by trying to ram it down our throats September time every year. Just yesterday I got asked again ...titled head muppet was hoping for details of food eaten, who I saw, how much I spent, what did I get ? Well I broke & said the unthinkable which resulted in said tilted head with concerned eyes wide with awkwardness ' I fucking hate Christmas' Hopefully that will teach her to never ask me ever again 👀 I thought all this shit was over. I felt relieved after the 26th. Ask me in December & the Christmas muppets will get a nice fake made up reply.... ask me on the 16 January & all hell is gonna break loose WAAAAA!!!

We’ve got it down to a fine art now but it took years. We used to all go to my parents for the annual family argument, and we sacked that off a few years ago. Then I felt we ought to host the in laws, and tbh it was boring and stilted (they are lovely people but old before their years).

For the last three years it’s just been us, and my sister. We share the cooking but keep it low key (we had kebabs the other year and last year was an Aldi frozen turkey and trimmings. Years past have been £90 Kelly bronze free range turkeys and a feast fit for royalty that no one finishes...)

We get through the gift opening at our own pace, the kids can start playing with their new stuff there and then (total opposite to the big Family Christmases where they have to wait), me and my sister watch Doctor Who and then do karaoke, DH tends to sleep and the kids do their own thing.

It’s marvellous, and I’ve found the love for Christmas again. We are atheists, so really it’s just a winter celebration.

The trick is to do what you love. And if that’s snuggling with the dog while eating pizza and watching tv, do it!

I enjoy Christmas on my own too but I find it a bit strange to absorb other people’s feelings about what Christmas is to such an extent TBH.

It’s literally no skin off my nose at all that other people find me strange or feel sorry for me or even that they comment on it. I find it a bit amusing and usually wind them up about really enjoying eating loads of food and watching Netflix all day on my own, maybe having a bath...

I like it so I don’t really care what other people think about it. In short.

The only thing that annoys me is that the last two years I haven’t had my DC on Christmas so I have been able to have my dream alone time and my mum has sent my dad to ‘check’ on me both times because they are ‘anxious’ about my MH.

People who ask if I had a nice Christmas are just making small talk IMO.

I just say ‘oh yes! I had an amazing Christmas! DC were with their dad and so I could properly indulge my anti-social nature by holing myself up in my house, eating boss food whenever I wanted, binge watching tv, sleeping a lot and having long luxurious baths!’

I even said this to my 93 year old grandma and she said ‘OH! Offred!’

Living alone produces many invites, I just tell all I am going to so and sos. Perfect

OP, you would enjoy my house. No decorations, no carols, nothing festive apart from some nice food. I had an "extra special" sausage and mash ready meal and a salted caramel melting middle pudding with an obscene amount of cream
Watched Harry Potter, read a book and cuddled the cat. Oh I had a nap too

I don't know why this has been revived but I hate all the Xmas circus so much I thought I'd post

I've only just got round to watching the Xmas episode of Victoria because I couldn't bear any more Xmas at the time and - no spoilers - I found the hypocrisy around family issues very interesting!!