I hate Christmas !

[exaustedofevwrythingbutgoing]

So, it's been 7 years now that I pass Christmas away from my family. My parents, my siblings ... I pass it with my own family, in a foreign country and each year I hate it more.

Before I thought that it was just because I missed everybody and our fun way of partying and making Christmas an amazing day where we all look forward the whole year to. But now I am more than convinced that I hate it. I hate it because my partner is an asxxxle man child.
I hate it because I can't feel the love in the air.

Last night for example. We spent almost £350 in Christmas food, appetisers, pudding, drinks and everything else you can imagine.

He decided to cook this year. He started at 9am. Yeah !! Fucxxxxg precoce. He wanted us to have dinner at 3pm.
Fair enough if we was starving. But his mum arrived at 2pm. We started with starters, meat, 10 types of cheese, toasts, sun dried tomatoes, olives etc around this time and at some point I told him that would be better to postpone dinner for 6pm, knowing that we still had the bloody prawn cocktail to eat 😬
We agreed with that, but just after 40 mins he said dinner was ready... me and mum looked to each other saying we were not hungry at all yet.. but to not let him down, she just sat at the table with him, making me having to do the same and children too.
None of us was hungry !! I felt bad and guilty of not being able to eat all my dinner and was completely unhappy withe all the situation and why he didn't do what we agreed to, avoiding him feeling that we did not appreciate his effort on preparing the dinner.
For me it was a completely waste of food, money and he needed up with a horrible trunk I his face until NOW because of it. The moods were down and everybody upset and it was a horrible Christmas !
I asked if he was going to keep this moody face during all our holidays and he just said nothing was wrong which is a completely lie !
I am up in my bedroom alone and upset because I hate this environment , we are not happy and enjoying holidays like a normal family and I prefer to be alone - and with my kids- instead of beside his big trunk.

I just want to vent. I hate not being with my family and having to accept this miserable environment :(

I hope many of you have happy family Christmas though.

Hugs xxx

I don't understand what ge problem is? Your dh prepares and cooks everything and you're not happy?

the*

3pm is a later dinner, maybe don't have a starter next time if it's too much.

I'm sorry you miss your family that must be difficult. Your dh is putting a lot of effort in and it sounds like he was upset because nobody was enjoying it?

Christmas "dinner" is understood by most to be lunch though, not an evening meal!

I am upset because he didn't do what we planned - to eat at 6pm, therefore we would have enjoyed the food instead of just scoffing up what we could.
The problem is that he never listen to me. I said it was too much food, to much for 3 adults only and that there was not point in starting dinner whilst we were still starting appetisers :(

I am very happy he prepared everything, but also upset that I couldn't show him how delicious everything was because I was full enough to eat !

Your husband put a lot of effort in, perhaps it was too late along in the cooking process to hold it off until 6 and that's why he served it sooner than agreed.
Maybe you could've asked him to scale down on the starters instead. In any case it's done now and it sounds as though after so much effort you still didn't enjoy it.
Perhaps next year you could spend it with your family too, would this be possible? Or maybe introduce some of your family traditions to the day to make it feel more enjoyable for you, I'm sure you dc would like this too.
Tbh I do feel quite sorry for your husband you sound very angry and ungrateful.

6pm is very late for Christmas lunch I think 3pm is fine. A starter of cheese and afew meats doesn't sound overly filling either I would have just paced myself. I would love somebody to do the cooking as I do it every year and have since I was very young.

But I don't understand why you started with all those appetisers when it's hard to time and cook dinner then delay it and ruin the food?

Especially when he'd started and you changed your mind. Surely it would've been better to pack up the cheese and get it back out at about 8pm?

Sorry op I don't have the answers for you based on this one example.

If he doesn't listen to you generally then that's a problem.

It was all my partner's exagerated choices :(
I know what to do next year !
No Christmas and a nice trip to Scotland to see real snow :)

Thank you everyone !

If you were having starters at 2pm and asked him at that point to delay a meal that was going to be ready for 3pm, that’s far too late. The main course (turkey:meat?) will have already been cooking in the oven for quite some time by then and you can’t just expect it all to wait an extra 3 hours, it will be dried out and ruined.

So I can understand your husbands annoyance if you stuffed yourselves at 2pm and couldn’t eat at 3. You knew he’d been up prepping since 9 and put a lot of work in. It’s rather inconsiderate of you. Why not save more of the snacky things for a lazy Boxing Day graze?

But he was also very unreasonable to sulk for so long and spoil the holiday. Being upset on the day ok fair enough but not to keep on making an unpleasant atmosphere. You both need to communicate a bit better!

TBH you were being ungrateful mean and controlling. Surely its up to the cook what time its served. You didn't have to eat loads beforehand but chose to and then think you have the right to postpone the dinner.
I would be bloody furious with you.
Sounds to me like you spoilt the day on purpose.