Anyone else playing at happy families this Christmas?

[FestiveFaker]

Feel so drained at the pretence that is about to begin.

Of faking a happy relationship in front of friends and family.

Of having to pretend all is ok when actually I want to just collapse and say I can't hack another day of this miserable relationship.

Hard enough feigning happiness in front of kids, but family are coming to stay this weekend and we will need to slap on a smile and try to hide fact that right now we find one another intolerable.

Sad and completely exhausting.

Roll on new year!!!!!

Yep feeling that too! Except we’re seperated but have decided to try again but have not told kids or anyone. He’s staying for a couple of days over Xmas and new year and we ll see how it goes.
If it’s that bad can you split? Pretending is hard work, truth might be hard at first but gets easier after time.

Am thinking will do trial separation in new year. Things been pretty shitty for a while really and it just isn't getting any better. Just so complicated with kids and thought of telling people is too daunting right now.

Exactly what we have done. Ours has other factors involved but the time out has been good, I m so much stronger for it and realise now what I will and won’t tolerate from him. Telling people wasn’t as bad as I thought. My friends and family have been great and those that haven’t I ve ditched as they couldn’t have been true friends anyway. Hope you get through Xmas ok.

I've been dreading Christmas, in fact any holidays because I know there will be endless arguments. I used to ask anyone and everyone over so that we were forced to be civil to each other. Family are NC now which I'm glad about (that's another story) but miss the distraction they created. It's hard living together when you have nothing in common and detest everything the other does. I battled for years but to try to make it work but the lack of loyalty and respect was the final nail in the coffin. I'm sure there are many people going through exactly the same. Holiday times people are forced to spend time together and it can be unbearable.

Yep argued with my ds but she is still coming for Christmas. And dm and dd have been arguing too. Plus me and dh seem to be in a shit mood with each other constantly. So it gonna be fun

I ended my misery with xp over the Xmas period 5 years ago. I think lots of relationships end at this time for these very reasons. We are all much happier now!

Hanging out for the week after Xmas to let dd have one last family santa day.
She’s 7 and asking questions (about santa and shouty daddy) so it’s last call all round really.

Literally just got off the phone to DM who has decided that she's not coming for xmas lunch after I declined her invite for boxing day (huge back story, olive branches offered, fairy steps to rebuild relationship after a shitty year).

Huge narc tendencies, it's all about her every single time. I'm done.

Another one here. Family driving me insane already for various reasons, including saying I have mental issues and I'm making up our children's allergies (I'm not - there are very, scarily real).

Husband and I are teetering on the edge of splitting. It's exhausting.

Merry Christmas :(

Our dcs found out on Xmas day we were divorcing.

Faking it here too. Oh not my kids' dad and we don't live together but I own a business that we are tightly involved with and have been limping on with him for a couple of years not knowing how to manage a split that doesn't leave my business in tatters.

So on we smile. You're not alone x

Another one here. Realised today we can't make it work. I'm also pregnant so can't even take the edge off with a sherry or two.

well not quite since we've been apart for sometime and he has an OW but he is coming to my parents for lunch. I refused last year it was just too raw but I've come along way and DS wants to see his dad on xmas day, so I agreed. I'll just have an extra port and lemon and grin and bear it.

This was me last year. After 20 years marriage I spent all day in the kitchen, cooking, to avoid him.
He sat on his arse watching telly all day.

This year he's spending Christmas with his new girlfriend in the house they have just moved into. Good luck to her, she's going to need it once the honeymoon period is over.
I can't say everything is perfect in my life but I have good friends and family. Hopefully 2018 will be a better year.

Me too. Waiting and worrying. The longer he's out, the more possibility he will be drunk and spoil things. ☹️

I'm feeling the same today x

I've been through this from so many years. Every occasion, Christmas birthdays etc are all a let down because he is so bloody miserable. He seems to have an issue with occasions. We now have 2 ds's. He hasn't improved. We separated a month ago and he moved out. Stupidly, I said he could come back today and stay overnight. I'm hugely regretting it.

My dad hasn't spoken to me for 5 months now but he still lives with my mum.

My brother, SIL and kids want me to go to my parents house tomorrow to exchange gifts.

I'd rather stay at home on my own but I'll go for my mums sake. She'll be left on her own with him for the afternoon and he's vile to her.

I'm going to a friends for lunch, they have a lovely normal family.

At least being busy around other people means we don’t have to focus on the fact that we’re dead in the water... well that’s what I find anyway...

Strength to you all. I hope 2018 is better for you all.