I tried to name change for this but it didn't work. I have posted a few times on here to do with my relationship with my ex, big part of it being his alcohol intake, but on the whole he manages it.
I live overseas but am close with my sister. She is older than me and always had an unhealthy relationship with alcohol. All her mistakes in life, all caused by alcohol.
Anyway, 2 years ago she met a wonderful guy. She seemed to be doing really well. She had split from her ex, who was a bully and their relationship hasn't been easy. She has a wonderful 7 year old son and a family that love her. In Jan she got reported for suspected drink driving in her own home (she went home and the police came to find her, breathalised her and she was 4 times over the limit). She denied it of course, said she had a drink when she got home, even if that is true she downed half a litre of vodka in 10 minutes, so clearly an issue.
Anyway, lost her licence for 18 months. On the verge of losing her job, her son, her partner. She manages to hold it together most of the time and won't drink some days, but she has this mad bingeing thing. This week has probably been the worst we have ever known. I am talking over 1 litre per day, she is tiny. Last night resulted in her partner going over, the police kicking the door down. When they got in she was hammered, lost a tooth and cut her face. The house was a tip. In the meantime she hasn't given a flying fuck about her son. My parents and his dad have picked up the pieces yet again. Social services have been involved in the past, but they were happy he was well cared for and there wasn't an issue.
Anyway this morning, once sobered up, first thing she did was book an emergency dentist and got her tooth sorted out. She hasn't washed in a week, but managed to call, make and appoitnment and go. I have told her she needs to go to her GP, but she won't. She doesn't think its an issue. Its always been her crutch and she is petrified to lose it. She sent her partner a text (she forgot he was donwstairs!) in the middle of the night to say she needed help with her destructive drinking, but not with drinking in general. She doesnt think she will cope with removing alcohol all together from her life, but its what she needs to do.
Of course we are all so worried about her, her partner has said he will help but he is at the end, but he is fearful she will continue to drink and harm herself. I worry for him.
To put it into perspective, my father is quite wealthy and gave us some early inheritance a few years ago, she decided to use that money to put her son through a private school, which has been great for him. He knows whats going on and he even had to call my parents before because he couldnt wake her up. She has her own house, my mum even pays for her taxis to work. She is having CBT on anti depressants and anti anxiety meds. This year she has had 4 holidays all funded by her partner. He loves her, he is by far the best guy she has ever had.
I just don't know what to suggest anymore. My parents are late 60s and they are tired of it all but at the same time, they bend over to help her, although I noticed a change in them this time, they didn't want to get involved, but it meant I was on the phone all night to her partner and he is beside himself.
I fit gets worse than this, she will end up dead I am sure of that. I love her dearly, we all love her when she is sober, she is a different person when she has had a drink.
Any ideas? Social services I don't think will do anything about it because during this episode she didn't have her son with her, but we know that in the past he has been there when she has been drunk. Do we call her GP? Do we call Social services? Do we allow her to have her son back, knowing she is highly likely to do it again? Do we back off, do we push her? I just don't know what to do. I don't want her to die, I want her to be well.
I know she has to want to get help, but...........