Embarrassing fanjo query: don't read if easily squicked.

[madamez]

Had lots of stitches after DS was born. DS now 2.6. Have not had that much penetrative sex since, but had some last night and felt definite discomfort - bloke's technique was fine, bloke was appealing, I was definitely in the mood - but sort of felt like there was a kind of 'fault line' somewhere inside.
Basically, do I need more practice, more lube, or to go and consult a medical practitioner? Much obliged for any advice.

if you still have sensitivty internally, then I would go and see your GP.
I have a scar line inside (dd2 is 16 months) and it can be a little uncomfortable at times.
I suspect, though, it is probably due to ahem lack of use iykwim, I expect it would get better in time

I had third degree tear and found it quite uncomfortable, but (to be graphic) it was more at the actual point of penetration rather than on the inside. I would get it checked out if it felt uncomfortable - was it round cervix?

I would ask your practice nurse or GP to have a look. I had a lot of stitches, both immediately after the birth and subsequently. Although it's taken quite some time to feel brave enought to have penetrative sex, I now can (and can enjoy it) and it really doesn't feel any different from how it did pre-baby.

Much sympathy! I had similar trouble after DS1 - went to see GP and she recommended lts of perineal massge with KY to soften up the scar tissue. Have to say this follows with my medical background on treating burns/othe soft tissue scars - massage stimulates the healing process and helps elasticity in the tissue. Worked for me but the best help was after DS2, I think midwife no.2 did a better job tbh.

Hope that's of help and it's more enjoyable in the future

A friend of mine had a similar problem. She found sex with her dp really uncomfortable after having her dd. She endured it because she didn't think anything could be done, then one night during sex she felt something "pop" and after that everything was fine again.

yuck - chipmonkey!

Madamez - how long has this been going on? It does take a while to get back in the saddle so to speak but now I only very rarely get discomfort if it is a different ..um.. angle.

I had an epesiotomy with both kids. After dd 5years ago sex was so sore I was almost screaming in agony. Then 2 yrs ago I had ds & the mw stitched me up better. I can now have sex, albeit it slightly tense & a little uncomfortable.

I would rather be on top, so as I can control the thrust & make sure my scar isn't being rubbed. Although I also like dh to be on top, but I am definitely more tense incase it hurts.

When I say hurt, I mean like a burning sensation, it's like there is a stone or something on the left side of the entrance.

Sorry for tmi

Definitely due to lack of use....it does get better - scar tissue doesnt stretch as readily - in fact can be tighter. It will improve

A friend of mine had to go and be resutured about a year afetr her son was born as they'd stitched her up so badly and she couldn't have sex without pain. See your GP.

I had a puckered scar after ds, where they pulled the stitches too tight and it did hurt while having intercourse. I'd go and see a GP. Mine did get better over time but, I never got it sorted out until I had dd, nine years later. There was I, post birth, legs akimbo, with the delivery consultant face to face with my fanjo, me exhausted and her tutting and going "Oh dear, someone's made a right mess of you, haven't they", whilst putting it right. Nothing like someone you don't know tutting at your fango!!

Basically I think it is a scar, it's aproblem of pain on entry, just feels like one side something pullng too tight (sorry for TMI). I will try massaging.
THing is, of course, my sex life is kind of erratic and unpredictable, so don't get that much opportunity for practice.
But thanks all for the advice etc

even though sex life is erratic probably good idea to get in the habit of massaging after shower/bath etc - did you do your perinium before birth? not too ownerous once you get - um - in the swing of it.

Good luck

This is such a common thing. I had third degree tear too and it always hurts just at the entrance. Had a smear recently and the nurse pressed the point and was like 'is it here' - 'ouch yes' I replied. It's just scar tissue and will get stretchier in time. My friend had the same as me but like liquidclocks, it vanished after second baby so I'm still hoping. Good reason for big family! Keep doing it slowly as it does get better I promise.

I did actually do a lot of perineal massage before DS was born but (I think I read this somewhere) he was induced which makes for a slightly rougher birth. I will get the old wheatgerm oil out and have another go. Thanks again.

I'm having similar problems and it appears that some of the stitches from my 2nd degree tear didn't dissolve and so it's holding my muscles taught. It's been 15mo and still hurts. Living abroad with crap doctors and scary hospitals so not going to get it solved right now. Wondering if chipmonkey's friend had a similar thing... Maybe mine will pop eventually...

madamez - I think it's worth a trip to the GP.

Sorry to bring doom n gloom but it still hurts me...

8 years later.