Sod it! May have to meet the ILs!

[CuriousaboutSamphire]

Gaaaaaaaaaaaargh! 17 years! 17 bloody years of blessed NC with StonerSIL and PoisonousSIL and nigh on none with BoneHeadBIL.

Then StonerSIL gets in touch. Turns out it was her birthday and she got so pissed she just had to contact DH and suggest a family get together this Christmas, chez Poisonous and BoneHead. They wouldn't dream of coming to see us in our new house, of almost 4 years, 10 years in the last one and they didn't get to visit us at all!

So, despite it being unlikely to happen, they'll just forget or will call late one afternoon and be surprised we ain't driving, I am giving it head room! what to wear; how to cope with the insufferably snide comments; could I respond honestly? and all that good stuff.

I had hoped we would never have to have any contact ever again. DH has long stopped initiating contact and seems happier for it. I dread to think how snarky he will be - they do seem to deliberately set out to hurt his feelings!

So... what do I want? Erm... just a bit of a hand hold I suppose

Or maybe just to say FUCK YOU out loud?

Should have said, if you 'stalk' from an incognito page you don't leave and breadcrumbs

Yes, it's his decision, but I don't see why you would make the effort to go there. Why aren't they blocked on your phones?

I wouldn't go but I'm glad you're feeling OK about it all.

I'm really curious about your work (I also left teaching). Can I ask what you do? (Feel free to pm me.)

maelstrop they aren't blocked because they never ring us. Maybe they have changed numbers, I wouldn't know. I don't have their numbers in my phone. Well, I have StonerSILs now

That and I don't think you could block number when I first got a phone, so I haven't ever done it!!

SandandSea I may not have or choose to! I think we'll see when/if it happens. I have pmd you about the job!

'Oh SIL by the way what do you think of the website? I saw via data capture that you had a good look, hope you liked it'

I had thought of just giving her the sample pack I give clients, including my quite posh business card, to save her the trouble of downloading stuff

For heaven's sake! Why are you even engaging in all the drama?

DH can go on his own - he's not a baby. TBH he sounds a bit of a twat if the only reason he wants to go is to show off about your business.

What drama? There is no drama. Not in the real world. One text to me, one phone call from him. That's it! I said, it was all in my head, I was the one who was overthinking it. Not DH, the man you assume so little of!

It's odd you say he sounds like a baby, a previous poster suggested I shouldn't have told him about the text, that really would have been babying him! We talked about it because we are adults, he wants to see his DSis, we both know it will be a tad frosty with the other two, we are weighing up the pros and cons.

He hasn't actually done anything, just said it would be nice if they could, for once, be nice... but that they won't! He's actually far less bothered by it than I am, is helping me laugh at myself for having been rattled by it in the first place.

Oh! OK, so this morning a follow up text reveals that there is indeed drama and StonerSIL was, most likely, the Flying Monkey BIL recruited in his hour of need!

Apparently PoisonousSIL has left him!

I have told DH that if he wants to fly in and rescue them, we have enough food and could even put them up. We have no plans that would be ruined, it would make for an 'interesting' time. Not a fun one, a guaranteed pissed out of his tiny mind on (for BIL), but we could... He looked at me and laughed, said it was a nice idea but there was no way in hell that would be happening!

So... Merry Christmas one and all! We're in for an interesting time, just not quite how I was dreading

Weird!!

It is! We sent over for an hour... StonerSIL is babysitting a drunken. maudlin BIL. We chatted, got the short version of "She has decided her life is too small for her", offered Boxing Day lunch, and have come home!

DH is a bit bemused. Too many conflicting emotions I think!

We shall see. Meanwhile, we have a capon to cook

It's either too early or too late or I've not had enough chocolate, but whatever it is I'm confused. That's neither here nor ther though, just wanted to say Yay! for doing the growing up thing. It makes Life so much less stressful. Hope you have a lovely day lass.

Sorry! I was still mulling it all over - there was a lot else going on in their lives. StonerSIL has also had some set backs, it was bit like being stuck in front of omnibus year's review editions of 2 or 3 soaps, all at once. But, simply:

PoisonousSIL has told BIL that he simply isn't fulfilling her! She has been having some lovely weekends away with her single friends and has come to realise their life together is just too small for her now!

I may be used to such stuff as she is the woman who defended all sorts of financial games theft from MIL by quoting a country song "We live each day like it is a gift, that's why it is called the present"

are these people functioning people ?

I think they'd say yes! To be fair StonerSIL only stopped working 2 years ago, apparently. She has been 'resting' ever since.

We don't really know them these days. It has been 15 years since we last had at meaningful contact. And I never was the best person to ask if you want an unbiased opinion of them