Is it ever possible to be civil?

[GoddessInTraining]

Split from my husband last year after finding out he had been having an EA which was just about to become physical. After we separated, found out about numerous other times he had cheated, lied and just generally acted like a despicable human being.
The last six months have been particularly brutal. Both children made allegations that their dad had hit them, investigated by SS and case was closed due to lack of evidence but I absolutely believe my children without question. My ex has now made us homeless and I have less than a month to find somewhere else to live.
My question is, after everything that has happened and all the pain caused, can I ever find a way to be civil? DC see their dad every weekend and because one of my DC is ASD, we also have to attend school meetings regularly.
Had a school meeting today and I couldn’t bring myself to say one word to my ex, I despise him for everything that he has done but I don’t want to hurt my kids.

My partners parents had an acrimonious divorce. He used to drop the kids at the end of the road, so he didn’t have to speak to her. They both ended up in the same room for his siblings graduation ceremony, about ten years later and managed to politely avoid each other. So um yes, it’s possible to be civil but it might take a while...

Yes, give it time - it sounds unlikely now, but there will be a time when you just don't care anymore; the hurt will fade and you'll move on and he won't really matter anymore. Then you might be able to be civil - and it does make life easier from a practical point of view. But it's still early days for you and it must be bloody hard.

Thanks for the replies. It was hearing my children talk about their dad hitting them that really tipped me over the edge, up until then, we had managed to be almost friendly with each other. Hopefully time will do it’s thing and heal these wounds too.