Help me deal with the evenings

[mustbemad17]

Newly single (been three weeks). 15 weeks pregnant, have a DD who is 5. I got so used to either spending the evenings with my now ex, or sitting & waiting for his shift to finish & he was heading home...i feel quite lost. When DD is in bed i literally feel like the flt is too big & i don't belong. The evenings are by far the worse part of this whole him walking out thing, I cam handle the days as there is plenty to do.

What do you do to pass your evening, especially if you are alone? I feel like i'm going mad!

Download the scrabble app on your phone and play with random opponents. Keeps you occupied. Sure others will have better suggestions!

Love evenings alone!
I go on MN, play my guitar, work out, deep condition hair, write a long email to friends i might have been neglecting, do some yoga, or my absolute favourite: long hot shower, bed, gripping book.

I play online games - my current ones are Scrabble and one called Fight List which is really oddly addictive. I have an Xbox for DVD's but I also have a couple of free games I've downloaded so I play those too.

Otherwise I have a stationary exercise bike, or I've been known to do those workout DVD's you can get for free on YouTube. On lazier days, I'll curl up with a film or a boxset, cuddle up with the cats and just relax!

I'm not alone, but I usually come to bed around 8-9pm. I will either watch tv in bed or go on my phone.

My children are 4 and 5, so don't actually need me to be upstairs.. but I'm 24wks pregnant and exhausted!
Fell asleep at 7:30 tonight! Woke up at 9 to DS (5) asleep on my legs haha!

Before i met my ex I was alone for five years & i loved it! I loved shutting off from the world. Now it just feels really lonely.

Will give your suggestions a go, thanks all!

I do puzzles (spider solitaire or scrabble or free online Tetris) and listen to uplifting YouTube stuff. Currently Wayne Dyer but there’s loads out there. Search whatever it is you want eg mend broken heart or positivity etc

When I was in your situation, I determined to study to better myself and so every spare minute was spent in activities that would eventually get me into a position whereby I would have both a really great career and a really good income.
Take control, that's what I did. No time for self pity. No time for anything else except developing my life strategy. Its hugely self empowering when you stop the internal voice that tells you you can't do things or you can't achieve anything. And never, ever, listen or give time to anyone who puts you down....ever!
Work out your long term strategy and just go for it.
And avoid self pity....it gets you absolutely nowhere.
Count your blessings and work on getting more.
It worked for me...

Palla what career did u retrain for?

I became an academic. Highly recommended!

Plan an evening that you would like,
write a list of things that you want to do if you have time, including chores and good things
combine them both into a plan for two or three evenings a week, then if you choose not to the things its a choice you've made and it feels better than sat there twiddling your thumbs

its mostly working for me

I've been single 9 months, I love the evenings. I do work full time in quite a stressful job though so am out the house for 10 hours a day. But you are working too, having a little one to run around after.
Every week I write a list of things I want to do in the house, sorting cupboards, cleaning carpets, I try to do at least one a day, some would say boring but on a lighter note my house has never been cleaner and I feel like I've achieved something each evening lol. Then again if I'm having a night where I can't be bothered I just have a nice hot bath, get my pjs on, cook dinner and by then it's time to go to bed with a good book.
Then again my relationship was abusive so some days I just didn't want to come home. If I am having a lonely day I just remind myself how much better it is that my home is my own again and I can do whatever I want, my evenings are my time to take stock of everything and shut out the world, catch up on soaps, have a catch up with friends or just enjoy the peace and quiet.