Anger

[orangescreen]

How angry can you get? Is it ever justified to use violence in a verbal argument. I.e hit and throw stuff.

No it's never ok to be violent

No to hitting. Never.

I get angry and have had to work on it over the years. I think these days my anger is covering up another feeling such as vulnerability, ie my anger is my go to expression when I'm really feeling xyz So perhaps at other times think about what other emotions such as rejection/ dissapointment etc you're feeling so it isn't always anger.

Maybe call a timeout until anger has died down. Anger does abate. Feel it, it passes, don't let anger own you.

Only once in my life did I ever get angry enough to want to hit someone.He was saying this other person really wasn't that bad (years later I heard him slagging off the same man)and I thought he was.
We had both had drinks and the temptation to smack him in the face was nearly overwhelming;he was saying something I didn't want to hear and I wanted him to shut up.
The strength of the anger was a terrible shock to me .I also wonder if I would have got so angry if the man I was having the argument with was bigger than me.
Is anger about power?As a young man at the time I knew I could easily tackle this older man.
The surge of adrenaline almost demands a realease and I think violent people really need help to learn to control this.Of course plenty don't want to control it and don't seek help.