I think I should just keep my mouth shut.
No1. He is off on a course at the other end of the country from 29th April, till 17th May. His mum is up the weekend he goes (2nd time in 12 months she has been up), and then she was going to come up again on 5th May with DH's nan, just for the day. So i arranged for my step dad and mum to come up that day, and me and DSes were going to go back with them for a week, on the 6th till the 13th. MIL has now said she can't come up on the 5th, only the 6th, which I said I was planning to go to mums. So MIL then said she would come up on 29th May instead. However this the weekend DH moves to live at the other end of the counrty because there are no MQ's availiabel for us to live in. I don't want her to come up then, as it will be last weekend with Dh for god knows how long. DH thinks "I should stop thinking only of myself".
No2. He called his dad last night, first time in weeks he had spoken to him, they never call us. Step MIL said she had tried several times to call us. I said that she must have called during the day when I was out, although I hadn't noticed her number on missed calls. She said , no she had called at night, every night for ages. Now, I haven't been out at night form weeks, there is no missed call whatsoever, yet she is adamant she called. I told DH that she was trying to cover up the fact that they never call by claiming that she did call. He said "why would she lie". Which means that he thinks I'm lying by saying there was no missed call at all by them.
No3. I told him to text his mum for her birthday, because last year I was very ill, my mum was up looking after me and I forgot. Got lots of text messages last year from MIL, along the lines of "it's my birthdya, you've obviously forgotten". Dh has told me "I bear grudges to easily ", because I said I had been really annoyed and upset by her comments last year. SO I have to take all sorts from his mum and accept it because it's not nice to bear grduges, she obviously has, as she has been in our house once in 12 months.
They are really silly trivial things, but I get so wound up by DH's unability to say anything to his dad/step mum/mum/step dad in case he upsets them "let's keepo the peace" he says, it's like a mantra. But i get annoyed at the fact that MIL goes to visit BIL and SIl, 20 miles down the road from where we live, every other weekend and never bothers to visit us, yet DH says "I''m not getting stressed, why are you". I just need to put all this down, as I just feel I must be such a bad person to think these things and get so wound up by it. I always end up feeling that everything's my fault, even though I know it's not.