Remorseful or just horny?

[CynicalOleMe]

I'm a years long member but name-changed for this one...

I got a facebook friend request and message from my ex boyfriend of over 2 decades ago. He wanted to apologise for being an asshole to me (which he was) had thought of me over the years, and hoped I'd find someone who was worth me (which I did)

I actually didn't open his message for several days, but when I did reply, he responded within seconds. I had replied that I didn't bear grudges, but thanks. There was a bit of chit chat led by him about our respective children for a couple of messages and I deliberately let the chat dwindle. He seemed keen to chat a lot more and his last question of whether I go home to [hometown] where he still lives I just left unanswered. I just realised it was following a familiar format...

I've had quite a few ex's surface out of the blue over the years usually to apologise for being a shit. Invariably this attack of conscience is usually accompanied by a bout of horniness. Maybe I'm too cynical by now...

I'm in a committed and wonderful relationship, so I've zero interest in making chit-chat with a man I can barely remember. So I know I've made the right decision to discontinue a private chat with him before it gets cosy or risqué and crosses a line inadvertently.

But it's struck me that so many men I know have done this. Is it just me or is it a man thing?

He's said his piece, you've responded. Personally I'd block him now.

Not necessarily a man thing , but it is something that people do when they're horny and alone. Males exes have tried it with me and female exes have tried it with my dp.

It's bloody annoying and you can see right through it.

What makes you think women don’t do this sort of thing? Lots do.

Not everything is about sex, maybe he wanted to make his peace with you. Can't always assume every man that talks to you ex or not is after sex

You should just block him, as if you think that's what he's after no point messaging him back you've said thanks he said sorry end of

Fair enough responses. I probably shouldn't have phrased it as a 'man' thing, and some of you have pointed out women do that too - which didn't occur to me to consider given that I've never had relationships with women and I personally have never gone chasing an ex I treated badly to get the leg over, nor have any of my female friends so I didn't think it was as common the other way around.

Pink Pillows I ^don't think all my ex's are out to shag me. I'm FB friends with several ex boyfriends and none of them have messaged me in a way that felt like this. It felt distinctly like I was being chatted up.

Point taken though. He'll get blocked this evening I think.