Family such a mess :(

[Champagneandthestars]

My cousin has just been found dead, BIL just come out of prison for child sexual abuse and complicating things with DHs family who are minimising his crimes. FIL no contact as he is dangerously delusional (criminally so) Walking on eggshells with borderline narc and depressed mum, dad who has decided he's too old to enjoy anything now (he's not) no contact with siblings, one of which is either on drugs or has a gambling addiction and cannot function in normal life (excuses always made but he's just a shit really). So tired and fed up of shocking revelations. I just want to be a normal family.

Dysfunctionality in families is like alcoholism. You did not cause it, you cannot change it, you cannot control it.

All you can do is try to stay away from it as much as you possibly can and understand that it is not in your power to change things.

You can change your attitudes and behaviours towards your family but you cannot change theirs.

I'm sorry to hear about your situation, OP. It must be very hard for you to be part of such a difficult family. But in order to save yourself from yet more dysfunctionality, you need to take a step back, grieve for the losses you've had, and move on with your own life. It's a long process but you can get there.