Dh wanted to leave, but does he still?

[peaprincess]

Dh and I had an arguement and he tried to leave me. I convinced him not to, but now I wonder if he is staying with me because he wants to or because I told him to.

The arguement was over his feelings towards my ds. He is his step-father, so worries a lot about how ds feels, and how ds's father is like. He told me he couldnt cope with ds's crying etc and didnt know if he wanted to do it anymore. He also said he didnt want to keep hurting me so he was leaving.

What do you think?

peaprincess, how old is your ds and how long have you been with your dh?

I dont really know what to say as I have never been in a situation like this myself. Do you think a holiday may be a good idea? Either as a family and see how you all get on without the pressures of home life or maybe he could go away for a couple of days and see how all you feel while he is away? Don't understand the jargon at the moment as I am new to this is it a son or daughter you have and how old are they?

i need some translation help, Dh,Ds? please help

Ds is almost 2 years and Ive been with dh about that long

Ds = darling son, dh = darling husband

My first night

What had he done to hurt you (in his eyes)? Why does he think he keeps hurting you?

Look at the acronym list link at the top of the page for the dh, ds etc abbreviations

sorry to interupt conversation, but do u know how much ur son weighs in lbs peaprincess

we have been arguing a lot recently, and he thinks he always hurts me and makes me cry

23lbs i think, im not too sure, why johno?

well ppl keep asking me why my son not walking on his own yet, and when i say hes only 14 months next week they dont beleave me, hes lb25.11

oh so u dont think hes fat hes 83cm in length

shouldnt think so, my ds is small for his age, he was premature

oh right, ok thanks

allthegirls - i did suggest that, if we have a couple of days away from ds, which may help. i just feel a bit confused on what to think

anyone else have any thoughts???

Hard one PP, when did his threat happen? How's he been with you since?

yesterday, weve been okay with one another today

The reason why I ask is that I live with my partner who is the step dad (to be) for my two, who live with us.

This once happened to us. We'd been away on our first holiday and the night we returned, he announced he wanted to leave. He said he was struggling with his relationship with my two as well as being pressurized (into sex for example) by me.

I was naturally upset but had the balls to say if he wanted to go, he could do but I would not want to see him again because he would mess my childrens heads up as well as mine. To give you some time scale, we'd met in May 1999, started living together in March 2000 and the thread was April 2001.

He stayed and we're still together today.

I'm a stepmum to dp's son and I find it hard at times although the little lad's only 6.

My personal opinion is stick in there. These relationships are hard. Make sure you get QT with dh and you be 'adult' together (not just physical but intellectual i.e. communicate!) My relationship with ex. broke down just after the kids came along - maybe he was feeling pushed out?

I think he wants to be with you - he's still there and you've both got something to work on. He sounds a good guy between the lines. He's probably finding it difficult to cope with the terrible twos, and that makes him 'normal' as they are trying times for everyone.

As long as you make time for each other, you'll probably have a great life together. The best of luck - step relationships are difficult.

thanks dottee, thats made me feel alot better. xxx