From once to "every time"

[exaustedofevwrythingbutgoing]

Hey... just curious to know what would you do ?
I go to a club 45 mins away from my home every weekend and once one of the boys asked if anyone could give him a lift ... I was reluctant to compromise with any other thing rather than taking myself and back to my family as fast as I can.

I decided to play the good girl and offered to do so, which meant double my trip time and divert my normal way to completely opposite direction to do this nice favour.

In the mean time another person from nearby also asked me for a lift haha,,, so, added more 20 minutes for the, then, 1:20 mins and picked up 2
People on the way.

They did offer cash for fuel which never happened...
Brought them back on the way home and now they are asking again 😭 for the same lift for the next weekend.
What I think that is very rude (It might be just me being over sensitive and BU) but They said let us know when you arrive home... which I did
And had no reply back ....
weekend after, cam the request for a lift again, which I wasn't expecting for this to become a routine thing... I wasn't going so I replied with a "sorry I'm not going this weekend" and after that no answer again....

AIBU to think that if you are trying to be nice to request a lift, you should also try to be nice to at least give the person you are requesting an answer ? Something the the lines of " oh, sorry to hear you are not well... but thank you anyway ?"

Jesus !! I'm so fed up of being used for favours and not hearing a word back ... all this group are always good on asking things and all but not at saying thank you .....

They've given themselves away as users really quickly. They've done you a favour, really!

Next time they ask say "no sorry, I'm not wanting to be committed to giving people weekly lifts as last time it doubled my travel time, costs a lot more in fuel and I don't always go direct to and from"

Mybrilliantdosguise

Do you think so ? Hahaha
I hate abusive people !

I'm glad you opened my eyes with the truth... I tend to have a soft heart

👍

Lixielulu

I find very difficult to be direct like that 😂
Maybe they can see that 😂😂😂

Yes Op. next time just a simple “sorry I have to get straight home” with a smile. And the next time, and the next....

They’ll get the hint !

Just say ‘Sorry, not able to do this’ and leave it at that. No need to explain yourself.

Don't even say 'I have to' as they can ask 'why?'. Just say 'No, I'm going straight home'.

Thank you all

Will try to be harder next time :)

Just basic assertiveness. Important skill to practise.

‘Nah it doubles my journey timr home’

Thank you JOjo,

Googling assertiveness now :)

Surely you could make up an excuse? You have to pick up your child/sister/partner (basically anyone who'd obviously have priority over them!) and have to run.

A lot!

of people think cars run on water free from the taps by the roadside!.

"No, I want to go straight home" sounds good to me!

You don't need to make up an excuse. Next time they ask you say you haven't had petrol money from them for last time and can't afford to subsidise them like that. Easy.

Don’t even reply. They haven’t replied to your messages so you are under no obligation to reply to them. Just ignore any future messages

No way! They can get the bus! They didn't start the course expecting a lift, so they make their own way there and back. Bleedin' cheek!
And then to not even say thanks!!!

It's surprising how persistent some people can be when you say no and give an excuse. I have learnt how to do it in a certain way that stops the arguments, I just say "No, I don't want to", with a really friendly grin.

The grin confuses them, I make my escape.

"My routine has change, so lifts will no longer be possible."

Keep it simple. Should they be rude enough to ask for details either ignore completely, or smile gently, "my routine" and wander off. It's none of their business.

they're users. not even trying to hide it.

'no i can't i'm afraid.' don't need to give reasons, although you have very good ones.