My husband was a drug addiction and I had no idea.

[HolyMacaroni4]

Together for 6 years, married for 2.

He came out and told me last night that for a large chunk of our relationship (before we were married or living together) he was heavily addicted to a class B drug. I had absolutely no idea. I'm in shock and struggling to comprehend it.

We've had some problems recently and he said he wants to move forwArd and for our marriage to work so doesn't want any secrets. The fact he was on drugs doesn't make me love him any less or think differently of him as a person but the fact that he kept it from me all this time and that I had no idea it was going on is really messing with me. What does it say about our relationship that I had no idea? Do I even know him at all? Is there more he's kept from me?

Please if anyone has been through this I need some advice on how to deal with this. My feelings are so mixed up I am mainly just really confused

Autocorrect in my title ffs, he was an addict not an addiction

My STBEXP was a heroin addict and kept it from his entire family and first wife (we aren't splitting up over that I hasten to add)

I imagine the hiding of it was a mixture of guilt, shame, judgement and the actual addiction (and maybe having to face that he'd have to come off the drug before he wanted to I guess).

He came off by himself and he hasn't done it for years. It's a shock I can imagine but I guess if it's a strong relationships out can talk to him about your fears and doubts.,

mickhucknall I feel so stupid that I never realised. I am so confused but it's slightly comforting to know it can happen and it's not just me. I want to move forward it just leaves me very unsure about our past relationship and trust.

Addicts are manipulative in order to maintain their addictions.

If he was a functioning addict then it is easy to imagine that part of his ability to function whilst maintaining the addiction was keeping it secret.

The fact he has shared it with you is quite positive.

I have experience with addicts and addiction.
Lying and manipulating the truth are symptoms of addiction.
It's great that he wants to go beyond that with you, and let you know him better. Don't feel that you should have known, unless you know the signs to look for, it cab be really hard. People cover up active addictions from their parents, partners and bosses really effectively.

Thank you for your comments you are of course right. I think I just need a minute to digest it but I want him to know that I am grateful he has decided to tell me and I don't judge him .

It's a shame he never told you early on.
BUT if he has been clean for some time, then I hope you can continue to give him your support. Just be aware of what to look out for, if he should ever slip back. Some people stay clean, as they realise it's a better life that way.
If he is truly clean, you know he has worked hard to overcome difficulty.
I hope you can get your head around this, and totally get your shock.