Found out my dad is a prolific drunk driver

[DadIsAMassiveAlcoholic]

Apologies for the NC but I really don't want this post associated with my normal MN profile.

Always suspected my dad had alcohol issues, but recently I've found out he's a raging alcoholic who drunk drives on an almost daily basis. Pops out for errands but actually goes and buys vodka and downs it before driving back home.

I strongly suspect he's driven drunk with me in his car - mother to his only grand child if suspected something wasn't right as he was twitching but his driving itself was fine.

He's ashamed we've found out and has asked for forgiveness. No chance. I've told him I'll tell the police if he doesn't stop, and my mum is now policing his accounts and driving.

I'm beyond furious. Hard to discuss with wider family. He's certainly the type to attempt suicide if backed into a corner.

We're supposed to be going round for Xmas dinner but DH and I not sure we can face playing happy families. Gutted for my mum.

Not sure what I want from this but I need to get it out somewhere. Thanks for reading.

Hi OP, I agree that you can't make him get help - the idea has to be his own. I've known people in AA who've wanted to admit that they have a problem and it's taken something like a chance meeting with a recovering alcoholic to give them the encouragement they need. One friend saw a leaflet at another friend's house and thought "I need to go there". There's also a 24 hour helpline for AA, operated by members, plus online meetings. There is so much support available.
I understand your post about it not being reasonable to drag others down with you - of course you're right, but the active alcoholic will be blinded to his or her effect on those he/she loves - until, that is, he/she starts to sober up and that's when what we call the four horsemen come into play - terror, bewilderment, frustration and despair. And then sometimes the only answer (or so it seems to an addict) is to escape into the bottle again. Of course it's selfish - we are - but it seems the only way out.
I'm not saying that AA is the only way, either - it's just the one that worked for me. I wish you and your family well.