Help me with my 7 year old

[abitofado]

My 7 year old ds has always had a temper. He can be violent and aggressive to people and property if he feels he is not getting his way. I struggle with him because of this. Today we were playing a board game with him, me and my dd (aged 4). He got upset because she did a move that he was going to do and so he started shouting and then throwing game pieces around and putting the game away so we couldn’t play.

Nothing I said would make him stop and I ended up carrying him out of the room which I don’t like doing as he wriggles and potentially could get hurt.

How could I deal with him better in this situation?

Have you got a triple P group/parenting course in your area? Really fantastic resource for dealing with this kind of thing.

Thanks SandysMam. We don’t where we live now but I did do the parenting puzzle when ds was small and I’m still lost. I just get so frustrated and I don’t know what to do during the situation, I always have problems in all areas of life in translating learning into practice. My parents used shouting with smacking as their solution to any misbehaviour and I don’t want to go down that route but I lack experience of anything else to have ideas in the moment.

At least you are acknowledging that you don’t want to be the same as your parents...that is a good start!! Make sure you really reward good stuff, so as soon as the game gets going, lay it on thick “oooh good move DS” etc. Then if it kicks off, say in a firm voice “no, we don’t behave like that” and time out until he calms down.
Keeping things positive seems to create a better mood for us. We went a bit “American” on DS’s ass and really overpraised, love bombed and tried to have a nice fun atmosphere as he was behaving like a nightmare, and it did seem to work. So as soon as bad behaviour happens, the fun stops and he has a time out...no shouting just no more fun . Then when he is good, good things happen. I am no expert though but has worked a bit for us.