dh financially irresponsible

[redbushleaves]

We have been married for over 28 years, are not particularly well off but do manage to make ends meet. dh has always been inclined to take loans and then struggles to repay them.

We have a joint interest only mortgage which is coming to the end of term. We also have two buy to let interest only mortgages which are also coming to their end of term. I wish to sell these properties and get a small house with the equity released, as we have no funds to repay the loans outright.

Unfortunately, dh wants to extend all 3 mortgages for another 15 years. I feel this is financially risky, especially at our age (we are both 55+). We keep arguing about this, and this has led to increased tension in our relationship which has always been shaky - we have had separate bedrooms for years.

With my dd about to leave for university I am thinking that separation may be the best option.

WRT the mortgages could you even get an interest free mortgage these days, especially at 55? There are lots of affordability questions now and the banks have to show they are lending responsibly, you'd still have these loans at 70, will you be earning then? How do you ever expect to pay them off? Do you have other investments which will mature by then?

Hohofortherobbers The banks might very well extend these for an existing customer. The issuing of paying them off is worrying and is the reason I do not want to take any further loans. In the past I have been coerced into taking and extending these home loans against my better judgement.

Follow your own judgement, OP. This will come back to bite you, and you can feel this.
Stand your ground - you don't have to separate, just don't take the loans. If he insists then refuse.

You should follow your gut.

He sounds bonkers.

Thank you for your replies Teabay and Swizzlesticks. They give me moral support to finally stand up for my principles this time. Dh will probably be very stroppy initially but it will be worth it to avoid long term stress and uncertainty.

I'm with Teabay and sizzles.

Stand your ground OP. Total support for you here

What's his reasoning for wanting to extend the term?

What on earth is the point of extending the loans if you have no repayment vehicle? You basically haven't increased your capital at all so far, what would change in the next 15 years? I completely agree with you, it's time to have a reckoning. Get that capital back out and have some security.

If he insists on going ahead, I would agree that separating - and thus separating your finances - is the way to go.

I really think you might struggle to remortgage three interest only properties at once, as a 55 year old.

He says the properties will increase in value over the next 10 years. They can then be sold and the money will repay the mortgage loan as well as generating profit.

I don't want to follow this path as I think there are too many risks involved - as well as being in many respects immoral - property prices being pushed up making it difficult for people to buy a home. The only real beneficiaries are the banks who earn big interest money.

Get rid of the mortgage or him either way it will be a load off your mind.

Are you sure that you want to leave him after 28 years of marriage? We all have ups and downs in marriage, and from what you've said there were kind of issues prior to coming to this point. Your DH's issues with loan repayments, can't you be the one to look after the payments etc? If that makes sense and is even possible (you don't want poor repayments to affect your credit rating).

Remind your DH of the financial freedom possible through the equity release. Show him the fact and figures of how much you have on the credit cards or overdrafts etc and then show him how much you could have after the sales.

Also if the mortgage is in both of your names he would need your signature to extend it. You don't have to sign it.

I'd want at the very least a plan for repaying the primary residence. Currently you don't have the certainty of repaying the loan there.

How much equity do you have in the properties vs how much loaned?

Gosh he’s a dreamer! No bank in their right mind is going to approve these interest free mortgages!

The only thing that may sway them is if you both have steady reliable employment?

Ending your marriage too? Must be other stuff going on!?

It will be messy if you divorce - you would need his agreement to sell up - or it will have to be court ordered

No-one can give proper advice unless they know the numbers. If you're paying, say, 500 per month in interest and renting the properties for 2000 per month you want to keep this money engine going as long as possible.
Unless you tell us more, responses are pointless.

Have you sat down with DH and gone through the numbers?

Going against the grain here, but can he be trusted to act responsibly if you do sell the rentals and release the equity? Is the market in your area stable for property generally, both rental and sale? How much equity would you generate from each, and how would you plan to make it last through retirement? Is ot worth considering selling one and keeping the second as a steady stream of income into retirement? I think all options are worth considering EXCEPT interest-free. If/when the time comes to liquidate the rentals, ideally you would like to have repaid as much debt on them as possible.

You need to give figures .If you paid £100k for your main house and it is now worth £400k then what's the problem .If the equity in the Buy to Let's is worth more than the mortgage then you should be safe

We originally paid £150,000 for the main house, he later remortgaged it to £300,000 to cover business debts. The house is now worth £600,000 due to London price increases (very modest 3 bedroom semi detached). The buy to lets have total equity of about £200,000.

So you've built up half a million in equity based on your husband's steer, and you call him irresponsible.

Get some financial advice and give the guy a little credit.

Disquited - the equity is due to London property price rises and will only buy a small house or flat here. However I agree that it is a considerable sum, which is why I don't want to take risks by remortgaging. Property prices can go up as well as down, as can interest rates.

Extending the mortgage on all three properties would be foolish I agree. What about selling one and remortgaging the other two. Large sums of money in the bank is a complete waste of time. IMHO. Property does hold it's value if you can ride out the bad times.

It does seem the properties in question have been a very good investment so I don't quite see what the huge problem is.

Hi op

I would be finding out if there is tax to pay on all that equity if realised

How has she built them based on her husband's steer? She was involved too 
Op already explained he takes out loans and then struggles to repay.

Sounds like you know what you to do op. Do what makes you happy and follow your instincts.

Thank you everyone. I think selling the two buy-to-lets to bring down the mortgage on our home would be the best way to go.