When you've just been told his behaviour wasn't just mean, it is domestic abuse

[Onlymeeeeee]

I met with a charity project worker who has told me that I didn't have to have been hit, that stbExH's behaviour is domestic abuse. I feel a bit shocked and a bit stupid for not realising.
We've been together over 10 years and although he was much nicer at the start, elements of his behaviour have always been financially abusive.
I've read hours of threads on here and never thought I would be posting this.

I've been referred for support which might include police but would be grateful if you have been through this you can tell me there's life better beyond this?

Please try not to feel stupid. Abusers are good at making you believe it's all your fault, otherwise they'd never get away with it. I've said this on here before, but knew of a psychotherapist working with abused women, who took over a decade to realise her own relationship was also abusive! She felt stupid too, but often it's our own strengths which are cleverly used against us.

Yes, life gets a whole lot better after the initial upheaval. Promise. You've just got to wade through this bit of shit to the clean shore.