We've been together for twelve years. He's amazing in lots of ways and I love him. He's my best friend. But for the last five or six years our sex life has really dwindled. Probably once a month or less and it's feels functional. I thought it was me - that I'd totally lost my sex drive. Maybe the perimenopause or something.
But just recently I've had a flirtation with someone at work and all that desire has come flooding back. It's so strong, I feel blown away by it. And I realise it's not that I've lost my sex drive, just that it's not working with DP.
I'm definitely NOT going to sleep with the guy at work. He's leaving soon so will be removed from temptation. He's married anyway. But I don't know what to do about DP. This flirtation has made me realise that I can't live like this. We have separate bedrooms - always have as he has insomnia. It feels like we're best friends sharing a house rather than a partner. Has anyone managed to fix things when it's got to this stage?