Hi all, I've namechanged as this post, linked to other threads could be identifying.
My mother has been an alcoholic since before I was born. I have an older bother (same mum and dad) and a younger sister (same mum, her dad is our first step dad) I didn't know my dad until early adolescence and discovered then that I had older brothers and sisters (bio dad and his first wife's children, close to my mothers age) for clarity, my father is much older than my mum, she was in her late twenties when they met.
Growing up, my mum's drinking was always part of our lives, we knew she was in AA and I went to Alanon and a teen version later on. My mum would spend periods of time away and we would sometimes visit, these were rehab facilities. She was the type of alcoholic to binge drink, she didn't wake up and drink every single day. She could go weeks sober and then fall back. I don't really ever remember her being drunk in the mornings. Some things stand out like her cutting my hair off while drunk, getting a friend to drop boxes of wine in the mailbox. She always 'married well' she's incredibly beautiful and we had a 'nice' upbringing because of this, lovely houses, holidays and private schools. No one would ever guess things were so terrible under the surface. She tried to commit suicide in front of me and my brother once, I froze and brother stopped her.
She went on to send me to the UK to meet my dad (my brother was already there). My father turned out to a huge bastard. He'd already kicked my brother out and had just got married and got sick of me being around quite quickly and I was kicked out too, I was 14. My mum came to get me and brought my sister it's a 20 hour plus flight so she was intending to stay for a couple of weeks and we'd all go home. But she left. Randomly took off and I went into care, haven't seen my little sister since. Then when I was in care with an amazing foster family, I met my first boyfriend aged 15, he was 17 I got pregnant and my mum came back, my sisters dad had taken her home on a pre arranged date and never gave her back (understandable) my mum blames me for this as ss told him in our home country that I was in care and why. We're in touch and she's had a good life/ upbringing.
So, I'm pregnant in another country, my mum comes and I have my son, leave foster care and get my own place. My mum is still 🍹 bf and I cut her out, periodically I go back to having contact with her. May last year she puts my children and niece and nephew in danger. I cut all contact. I'm so done in by it all.
Last night I got a call from one of her AA friends, it seems he is last one able to put up with her and she is now drunk constantly, drinking 6+ bottles of wine a day and not leaving her flat. I asked what prompted his call and he said he accompanied my mum to some appointments and she has cirrhosis of the liver. He thinks she has a year. He isn't a Med professional but has been to all her appointments. There's so much more but this is so damn long, thank you to any one reading. I don't want my mum to die.