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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Move in with mil ?

28 replies

autumnnn · 06/11/2017 19:43

Been with my partner 3 years, we want to buy a property together but as we need a huge deposit, it's just impossible to save.
I wanted to make sure it was the right decision before committing to move in together so rather than him move in with me and my lo ( I currently rent ) his mum has suggested me and lo move in with them.
She has a big house and works quite a lot so we would have our own space
We have worked out we can save a hell of a lot, still living and giving his mum something too but I just wanted some advice
Has anyone done this before and any tips ?
I moved out of home a long time ago and have lived on my own with lo for a while.
Hope to be moved for xmas all being well as I only need to give my landlord a month
The area would mean my lo would have to change schools ( I moved away for my los dad but when we split 4 years ago I've been wanting to move back down ever since )
Thanks for reading
X

OP posts:
K0729P · 07/11/2017 11:30

I'm sorry if it is obvious, but what is the difference if he moved in with you over you moving in with him AND his parents.

Surely you would be better letting him move in with you and contributing for a few months to make sure it's feasible living together and then decide about moving in with MIL?

If anything was to happen he can move back in with DM and you will still have your home for you and LO. Also the change of schools for LO would be a concern of mine.

rockcakesrock · 07/11/2017 11:33

My son moved in with his ILs. It worked really well. They are lovely people. The important thing is boundary setting and not taking advantage. They contributed to bills and food very generously as they did not pay rent. They have had their own home for 4 years now and are incredibly close to them. My son's MiL is terminally I'll now and I know that he is doing lots to support her and his FiL. They both know that they could not have afforded to buy a house without the help they got from the ILs.

autumnnn · 07/11/2017 15:02

Because my rent is £900 per month so plus bills I pay £1200 so i would have no rent and no bills moving in with mil?
And he does practically live with me so I'm not worried about that side of things

And I am moving her schools anyway
As I have said I'm moving back to the area I want to be in so moving regardless

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