Am I being paranoid

[Happyfoodie50]

This may sound silly but want opinions please.My partner of 10 years had his birthday on Friday . The only issue I have in our relationship is I get anxious with his office relationships. He works mainly with women and I have found him flirty /joking texting .he doesn't know I know.Nothing really inappropriate but feel horrible. I think because he is such s bad texter with me it makes me feel he puts more effort in with these women. Anyway his birthday was last week. He told me that he had to pop into office that day for an impromptu meeting with manager previous to that he said he was working elsewhere but I think they had organised something for his birthday. Nothing wrong with that but why not mention it. He smelt of garlic as well which made me think he had a meal out. When I gave him my card he said it was a poor birthday as only had my card from me and his son. Today I found a collection of Birthday cards from these women at work and a huge card under his car seat signed by all his work colleagues and chocolates. One said to Mr Handsome and hope you enjoy the surprise meal. So does it matter he kept quiet.He lied about the whole day and even said he was full when I got a Chinese that evening saying he had been snacking.It's not a big deal but made me feel weird. I haven't got a history of argueing over this but he seems to keep our 2 worlds separate. He never has his phone switched on or takes calls in front of me but know he gets texts and has previously had an affair when he was married to his ex. Paranoia is an irrational emotion but my gut is telling me something ?

Thanks guys .i do feel sometimes I'm being petty but probably not I always believe behaviour is wrong if it makes you feel crap. I believe he doesn't really mention he has a partner at work or we are not serious and allows him to be friendly and boundaries not so strict as they think he's available. I think I've known that and why I'm more anxious. I never want to be someone that controls his life but what's weird he can be really needy with me.

Do his work even know he's in a relationship? I wonder how much of his life he tells them. It seems SO odd that he won't tell you anything, unless he does worry about how you'll react. He probably loves the attention from all the women at work and knows it's wrong that he flirts with them too (or maybe more), so tries to keep it from you. I mean he clearly hid the 'Mr Handsome' card because he didn't want you to see it. But at the same time, I can understand that he may not have wanted it to wind you up. Seems odd that he would keep it though if he was never going to show it to you. I would go with your gut. I think the birthday card etc is one thing but the fact he lies about trips away etc. that would be the BIG thing for me. I couldn't trust someone who told me they were working alone somewhere when in fact they were away with others

He's not worth your time and effort.
He lies to you because he has no respect for you.
He uses lies to manipulate people.
He wants to keep you on the back foot in the relationship which just raises your anxiety and stress levels.
Put up all his birthday cards you found in the car out on display!
Then tell him it's over.

So instead of dumping him I took him out for his birthday and his son. I wore heels for a change and he parked miles away and had to walk about a mile,heels got stuck in the paving, was funny but he glared at me and was really annoyed saying I was an embarrassment. Obviously realise he hates me and so won't be hard to dump him. Went to toilets and had a cry .realise I've put up with a shit relationship for far too long. Now realising he must have someone else as can't understand why he's turned on me.