Can anyone identify with this, or offer any ideas to help?
I was badly bullied at primary school & it took me a long time to get over. I have a good life, lovely dh, close friends though it takes me a long time to make them.
My problem is not with me, but with my ds's. When it comes to any friendship wobbles or arguments, I have literally no resilience and I pretty much collapse into a heap of anxiety and catastrophising. i can tell myself as many times as I like that it's not so serious & these things happen, but i can't believe it, and get stuck imagining all sorts of bullying, isolation and hurt being inflicted on them.
I try very hard not to let them see this, and keep it all very breezy. But I don't know how best to advise them on how to deal with friendship problems, and I don't know how to become more rational and less anxious about it.
I was always a dreadful appeaser, and wouldn't stand up for myself. I still don't, I just run from confrontation and I still feel like people take the piss out of me at times. How do I teach my boys to be assertive, and resilient, when I'm so incapable of it myself?
It all sounds trivial now I've written it down, but as they get older & friendships more complicated it's becoming a real problem for me.
Can anyone relate? I think knowing I'm not the only one who struggles with this would help, and any advice would be so much appreciated.
Thanks.