I don't want to be in the relationship but I'm not strong enough to walk away

[Amberhill]

Can anyone identify? It's stupid isn't it... why can't I just get on with my life ?

List all the things you don't get (but want) from your relationship and think about whether you could get all that with someone else.

What is holding you back, kids?

I just don't want to be alone. Really scared of that.

Don't be scared of being alone, do you have family and friends nearby?

I was scared of being alone when I left my DH, (and I had the added worries of effects on the kids) but I'm the most settled I've ever been and never been happier. Which would you rather have a lifetime of unhappiness and being unsure, or a satisfied life feeling at ease?

No, and even if I did, it's not the same.

I feel you, I walked away a month ago and I’m sick to death of being told that I’m lucky because I have friends and family around me (I realise it’s said with good intentions).

F&F don’t cook dinner with you, or binge watch GoT, or cuddle you in bed.

It was my decision but it scares me so bloody much, I’m constantly questioning whether I did the right thing, and if I’m alone in 10 Years how much I’ll regret my decision now.

Sorry, probably not helping!

I get it.

I'm currently in a marriage I desperately want out of, but I am not strong enough.

Oh its really sad to be afraid of being alone. You need to get good at being on your own before you choose to be with someone and give up your independence.

I've been divorced for 10 years and had relationships on and off. But I'm mostly on my own. Whats to fear? If I cant sleep at night I go and get a cup of tea and listen to music, if I feel like it I spend all day in bed watching movies, I eat when I like, go where I like, see my friends, take up new hobbies, make all my own choices. Sometimes I'm lonely - but you know what - it can be just as lonely being unloved in a relationship. Choose for yourself and live the rest of your life as you want it - we only have one life on this earth so why not invest as much as possible in the here and now than wasting it unhappy. Find the strength....

I'm the same. Yesterday I found some writing I did in 2015 about how unhappy I was, 2 years later still here. Husband tries his best, does loads for us and a lot of people would love to be where I am but I just can't love him anymore. I'm miserable around him. I want to leave too, 2 young children and not a lot of money myself so don't have the guts.

I don't believe I would meet anybody else. I'm too old, too ugly and too useless. Its like being in a job you hate but knowing you'd never persuade anybody else to employ you.

I think being happy when single is very, very difficult.

I feel I shouldn't say that but it's honestly what I think.

I think being with someone who doesn't appreciate you must be very, very difficult.

Happily single for over 30 years, having been married, LTR etc; now have a FWB thing going on so my needs are met. When they aren't - NEXT!