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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Lonely

6 replies

Hmmmmmmmmmm10 · 29/10/2017 09:04

My relationship with DP is pretty crap. Been trying and hoping but nothing is changing so need to think about moving on. I have some great friends but due to babies (firsts and seconds) everyone is a lot busier than normal. I am quite rightly bottom of the priority list but I miss them. I only have one and it’s getting easier as he’s older. Not sure what to do to feel less lonely than I do. Terrified of splitting up and sharing custody as DS is the best part of my life. I do about 90-95% of our time with him (the time he can be with me when not at nursery or being looked after by my folks when I’m at work). Generally feeling quite crap and trying to think about what to do next and how to feel better. Anyone?

OP posts:
Queenofthedrivensnow · 29/10/2017 09:06

You will be happier I promise. You will have more free time in which to make more friends/start a hobby go to the gym whatever. If you do all the care you won’t miss him! I left exh when dd1 was 2 and I wS pg with dd2. No regrets and my friends stuck by me. Was 5 years ago I still don’t regret it!

Biddylee · 29/10/2017 09:08

Things do get easier if you move on. It can be hard but it's better than staying in a relationship that can't be fixed.

Hmmmmmmmmmm10 · 29/10/2017 09:18

How did you sort out custody? I don’t want to spend money on solicitors ideally as I’ll need it to sort out my flat to make it nice again for us to live in after tenants.

OP posts:
something2say · 29/10/2017 09:20

Yes you sound fed up to me. Listen, why don't you think about how it would feel to have decided to leave him? What would you do?

I used to do this and I recognised that amidst the worries and the prospect of all the work ahead, I'd also feel alive and excited again. If you feel like that, then it may only be a matter of time until you set off on that very road xxxxxx

something2say · 29/10/2017 09:21

Arrange custody yourself. Agree one night after school for a few hours and overnight every other weekend. Don't need solicitors if it will be amicable?

Hmmmmmmmmmm10 · 29/10/2017 09:53

Thanks. How do people manage the interim bit between deciding and actually being able to move out?

Everyone is busy with their families this morning, I am definitely going to have to find things to do that are outside my current domain or just live in disappointment and spend the weekend time DS is away from me alone. Sorry to be so glum.

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