Crazy MIL

[Gunsnrosesxo]

I think I have the worlds most rudest MIL.
She's a crazy woman and is trying to break up my marriage.
The only thing she cares about in life is money and always puts other people down including my family.
Anyways, she gets really jealous if my husband enjoys the presence of my family.
She always bitches about me and my family behind my back ( I think because they're so insecure)
I once had a massive argument with her because she was talking crap infront of my face and I couldn't take it anymore and lashed out. Since then she always says what's really on her mind and messasges my mum.
I'm not allowed to leave the lights on or allowed to use the lights of the air vent because it's wasting money. She is extremely TIGHT with money.
I'm not allowed to make the slightest noise when I close the door or talk loud in my room.
One time my husband didn't go to work because it was my sisters bday we was going out for a meal (he works in his dads shop) when we returned back home his dad would not let us in the house and threated to kick us out. Only because he chose to come to spend time with my family instead of his work.

You live with them? Move out!!

Yes, move out. Their house, their rules, unfortunately. If you don't like it, then you have to find your own place. It does sound rude and she shouldn't be speaking rudely to anyone including you or your family, but I would give them less fuel for the fire and make your own lives.

Move out

Move out then, it's her house not yours

Leave that house as soon as you can and move in with your family.
What does your 'D'H to support you in all this?
Nothing! Is my guess.
Don't keep yourself in this miserable situation.
Get out and get independent.

I feel for you OP, but it’s beyond me why you would choose to live with that. Surely you had an idea of what she was like before you moved in?

Move out and get DH to get a job elsewhere or they will continue impacting your lives

Move out , and DH needs to get another job.

I agree. Move out.

Why on earth are you living with her?? The solution to your problem is simple and obvious. MOVE OUT.

Move out. I’m guessing your staying there rent free why don’t your family put you both up. Also your dh was out of order not to go to work more so as it’s his dads company he had a responsibility as an adult not to take time off as he pleases because his father owns the place!

Thank you everyone for your comments.
We're still quite young and my DH says he doesn't want to go out and rent as well struggle to save.
He's parents have money so he's assuming one day they will help us buy a house which I know they won't!
I'm stuck as he doesn't want to leave and I'm not wanted here.

If you can't move, then you need to take control of yourself. Stay away from the house as much as possible. Work, volunteer, take reeeaallly long walks, whatever. And when you're at home, try to be as helpful and calm as possible. Whatever you have to do until you're out of there.

Stop being a passenger in your own life OP! It's time to put your foot down, your husband doesn't get to dictate to you where you live. You're not happy there so tell him you either move out together, or you'll move out on your own. Could you afford your own place? Or maybe to move back with your parents if it came to it?

I'd rather rent forever than live in those kind of conditions, waiting for a house that may or may not be bought for you (and lord knows it'll come with all sorts of conditions bestowed by the inlaws if they do buy you a house...). Home ownership is absolutely not the be all and end all of a happy life.

What does your husband say about how his parents treat you? Are you a team, or does he prefer to brush it under the carpet and not want to rock the boat? Get a copy of the book 'Toxic Inlaws' by Susan Forward and have a good read. Your husband may well be in the 'FOG' (fear, obligation, guilt) and depending on if he can come out of it and focus on your relationship and do what is best for you both (i.e. move out together, even if that means into rented) or if he would rather stay put and hope for this mystical house that may or may not materialise will tell you a lot about the future of your relationship.

I'm stuck as he doesn't want to leave and I'm not wanted here
Are you stuck though?
Can you move in with your parents?
Do you work?
How far away are your parents?
Could you rent on your own?
Serisouly, this is miserable and horrible.
You should be enjoying your younger years.
Get out GET OUT GET OUT
NOW!

I work 5 days a week I'm a really busy person, my parents live an hour away and I wouldn't want to move back in with them as they house is a little over crowded.
My husband is supporting me as much as he can he's also had enough but is just telling me to be a bit patient and see what happens next.
I think if his parents say one more thing we're going to have to find our way out on our own.