Confusing chivalry

[EH346]

I was sat watching tv with DP last night and subject of kindness came up. Out of the blue he said 'I'm a kind person, today I saw a woman and her baby sheltering from the rain on the street. I stopped my car and ran and gave her my umbrella' He couldn't understand that I found this a bit out of the ordinary and kept saying 'it was for the baby'. I admit I did react and say that her first response was that might be weird and that he wouldn't have thought of the baby so much if it had been a man!! Am I being insecure about this? Need a different opinion x

There are definately many men out there that would show more kindness towards a complete stranger than they would show to their own wife!

I'd worry that a partner who did this would be prone to ostentatiously doing "kind" acts for others that would disadvantage me somehow (volunteering my time, inconveniencing me, spending our shared money, in ways that I didn't necessarily agree were necessary).

This is an interesting point. I have been with someone who was a bit of a people pleaser and would do something like this. He was a bit insecure and I did bother me when it disadvantaged me e.g he would do a favour like driving home for Christmas with his car full of friends gifts and other stuff but have no room for mine.

I think it's lovely of him but as long as it's not a habit where validation from other people becomes more important than doing stuff for you.