I am miserable.

[McBounty]

I am just not happy in my marriage anymore.

DH and I have been together for 11 years, almost married 8.

We have a gorgeous 9 year old son together.

DH isn't a very good Dad.
He smokes weed every single day and then the smell is incredibly strong around our house.
DH and I argue a lot.

DH was in the army for almost 8 years.
In this time, I followed him all around the country. I had no friends at all. I was very lonely and incredibly lonely.
We then moved back to our home town last year and I have made a huge group of new friends through my new Christian faith.

DH hates this. It really upsets him.
Not only because he doesn't believe in God (which I respect) but because I spend some time each week with all of my Christian friends, just meeting for coffee etc. He tells me I go out way too often, that he is now second best and even went as far as to ask me what I would do if someone held a gun to his head or God's head.
crazy right?

DH is in councilling now, but I don't see how it's benefiting him yet. He is still so selfish.

Even my DS said he would like his a dad to leave.

We argue daily.
I don't want to be intimate with him.
I am sick of the smell of weed.
I feel like I am being controlled and no longer respected at all. It's making me wake up miserable every single day.

Can anyone advice the best next steps I could take.

Thank you.

Did your DH come back from the army with PTSD? What do you think he is smoking the weed for?

You say you argue daily? When was the last time you had a talk without voices raised about what matters to you?

Based on your post; I can see why you feel miserable. Are any of your needs as a woman and a wife being met?

I also have to offer an observation; in that anyone who smoked drugs in the same house of my son would be out the door in an instant. As I am sure you do to; I also worry about the effect of the constant arguing around your DS.

It sounds like an awful situation for your son. Do you think you would be better splitting and trying to co-parent?

I can tell you that as a single mum life is much happier than what it was when I was in a shitty relationship. That said I don't think I would want to let my kid be alone with someone who smokes weed every day.