I have been in a relationship for 4 months with a guy who I thought was really lovely and different from the rest. It's been very difficult to spend time with each other because he's a single dad to 3 kids, his ex never has them, and I've been very accepting and understanding of that. It's difficult to even speak to him on the phone as his kids are often up until very late.
Disaster struck 9 days ago when I found out I was pg. Since then I've seen him once. It was clear from the moment I found out that there was only one option here, I don't want to bring another child up on my own which is what would happen. It wouldn't be fair on any of the existing dc either. It's been a massively emotional, shitty week and a bit for me, and if anything his contact has got worse, not better, just when I really need him.
I know he's struggling to deal with the whole thing, but so am I! I'm heartbroken. It came to a head last night when I let rip at him on the phone for not being there to support me through this, I understand seeing him in person is tricky, but I can whatsapp him and not get any reply for 8 hours, or I phone him and he just doesn't bother phoning me back at all, until I phone him again hours later. Meanwhile, he's frequently online on whatsapp, so it's not like it would be much of a hardship for him to just reply to my message. I don't think it's asking much when I'm going through hell that he's 50% responsible for.
Anyway, last night he got really upset when I pointed out how shit he'd been, apologised profusely and said he would make more of an effort. He said he just wanted to be here to give me a hug, and he'd ask his mum in the morning if she could babysit so he could come tonight. Was looking forward to seeing him all day. Got a generic good morning/talking about the weather message this morning, then nothing until 8pm, when I got another message asking how my day was. Nothing about coming over. I asked at which point he was going to tell me he wasn't coming over, and that it was unbelievable that he couldn't spare 20 seconds of his day to break this news to me without me finally having to bring it up at 8pm. This is him making an effort! It all escalated via whatsapp and I told him he's a cunt. He replied with a sad face and said no-one has ever called him that before. I replied saying could he really not see why I might think that? No response, that was 2 hours ago.
So looks like I'm off to the abortion clinic on my own in the morning then. I'm so upset. I feel like he's just opted out of dealing with any of this while it's been 24/7 for me. I really don't ask a lot from him, but just some temporary support from him while I'm going through this would have gone a long way.