Has anyone started a new with dc's? I don't want to live here anymore!

[cupcakesmakeyouhappy]

I live in a small community, where I grew up and went to school. My parents live close and 2 siblings. I see my siblings maybe twice a year. My dad floats in and out of my life and my mum has always been quite self absorbed although we do see her more than anyone else.
My ex lives in the next street with his girlfriend and grown up children. We don't speak. My ex sees our dd's two sundays a month. Never takes them on bike rides, picnics, cinema, day trips, holidays. They're not allowed at his house (we have no clue why, he wont say) so he takes them to his mums.
I live in the house we bought together and pay all of the mortgage. He does pay maintenance. I have been doing this for almost 6 years and its been a struggle.
I have been working on getting myself a career to eventually buy him out/sell, whatever. Working/studying/juggling!
I dream of starting over somewhere new. For many reasons, mainly because I have unhappy memories here, where I live. From when i was younger/ school days/ broken relationship. We have a lovely home and its a safe community. Everywhere I go I see someone that just brings back lots of memories I wish to forget. So I don't actually go out local (walk, shop, pubs, gym). I drive places to do this.
My dd's are 12 and 10 and have friends, especially my 12 year old who is at secondary school. I can't sell for another year anyway. Which makes dd's older again. Would it be unfair to take them away from their home, friends etc? If they were younger, I think it would be easier. I think to myself, I could commute every morning so they can stay at their school, see their friends. Or am I just dreaming? Do I just wait it out another 8 years until my youngest is 18 and more independent.
The thought of moving and starting a new, fills me with happiness. Being able to walk into a village/town and shop or just socialise or go to the local park, gym, restaurant, cafe is normal right?
My mum thinks I'm running away from me and I can do all those things here.
Anyone actually started again in a new town with dc's?

Anyone? :(
Feeling a bit poop lately. Its hard being a single mum sometines....No family or friends to talk to can make you feel a bit lonely at times.

Hello Cupcake
Sorry to hear you are feeling like this, I don't have a huge amount of advice but didn't want to read and run. A few years ago we moved from one end of the country to the other; I knew nobody in the area we moved to, and since then have been building up friendships through local clubs, organisations and to be honest just saying hi in a local shop! It's a big step and at times felt really daunting. I did have moments of "what have we done" and felt a bit isolated at first but I can now say it's the best thing we ever did. We don't have children so I can't advise on that but I hope this helps.
xx

I understand the reasons that you want to move. However have you investigated exactly how much it would cost to move, because it is expensive. Examples van to move, if you buy a house it involves house survey, solicitors fees, remortgage fees, land registry fees, stamp duty, finding another job, commuting costs, house renovation costs, emergency costs. There are places where housing is cheaper, but job opportunities may be less. Also you would need to build up your support network again

Could you move 'slightly' outside the area? I lived for years in the place I grew up, and similarly to you my parents, my exes parents and siblings all lived there too and I felt it was claustrophobic and hated everyone knowing your buisness. We ended up moving 15 minutes away so day to day we didn't bump into anyone and a different high street etc. but not too far away from support or school.

Blackadderpants - thankyou :) that sounds very brave but great too. I'm glad you are happy now. I can imagine it feeling very daunting at first but thats what I imagine. Initially a bit daunting but building a whole new network.
Hholidayyy - Thankyou:) I haven't! When you list it like that, it seems alot. One day I will have to anyway as my ex is still on the mortgage. Or at least remortgage to buy him out. I am not too worried about work as I have looked into that and have no worries. I dont have a support network where I live.
Rocketbuddies - thankyou :) yes, this is what I am thinking. Maybe not too far! Glad it has worked out for you. I envy people who have actually done this.

Yes I have. There was a post on a similar question about 6 months ago with a lot of helpful replies.

Make sure you research the area well, maybe rent for a while first so you are super sure about buying. Get involved in some local stuff etc.

I'm a single mum so I was a bit worried about moving to the place I did but I don't regret it at all.

My friend's Mum moved from a small town to middle sized city to help care for my friend's DC - and built herself a fantastic new life in the process.

I'd make a long term plan if I were you - looking at jobs you could apply for or places you could commute from, property prices in different towns, local amenities, clubs/hobbies you'd like to join/try. If you moved somewhere not so far away you could join something now. You have 6-8 years to do extra training/save up a deposit/overpay the mortgage. Just keep planning and keep your dream alive. DDs will be off to college/work/university anyway by then. They will be old enough to get buses/trains to where they need to go/see friends. If you don't move too far they can easily manage a bit of a daily commute if they don't want to change schools.

A happy motivated Mum is a great role model for DDs. (I know there is a balance, DH and his cousins did without - think Christmas presents and underwear - so that MIL and AIL could have luxuries/money in the bank/be mortgage free. )

Jeaux90 - thankyou:) you are brave too. Glad it worked out for you. I have researched lots. It's what keeps me motivated.
Apileo - thankyou :) that's inspiring.
Yes it is a plan. It just seems so far away when I am 40 now. Maybe my the only plan available to me. You make it sound more appealing though :)
Your dh went without underwear and Christmas presents?