Dp's daughter has started to worry about her weight

[HoHoHoHo]

I am absolutely gutted that Dp’s beautiful 10 year old daughter, who is of a healthy weight, turned to me last night and said her tummy was too big. I can’t believe that the dissecting and hatred of her body has started already. She seems like a little girl still and she has her whole life to worry about this sort of thing. I am so sad it has started already.

It's so horrible that your DP's DD feels that way but who can blame her when we live in a society that puts so much pressure on girls to look a certain way? I think that all you can do is reassure her that she's beautiful, intelligent and a million other things besides. Let her know that she has so much more to offer the world than her appearance.

Focus on the health aspect -- teach her about nutrition. She might be interested in learning to cook. Also focus on being active in fun ways.

Does she play any sports? Some sports help girls see their bodies as functional and strong, some sports focus on thinness and prettiness. Both my DDs were competitive swimmers, which worked well. When they were really little they took some gymnastics and dance classes, but then I cut those off because as the girls get older, because they are too linked to eating disorders.

I also liked to expose my DDs to strong women in a variety of careers. Biographies and autobiographies.

Good for you for being a "bonus" mom to her. I think that the more sane adults a child has in their life who deeply care about them, the better! I think that the more messages we can give girls that they aren't here just to be decorative, that we value them as people, the more it helps them move past all the nonsense they get from society.

It's just said. Obviously I reassured her but that's not much compared to the pressure of society. I'm just sad it's started so young.

'She has her whole life to worry about this sort of thing'
If a grown up can't be confident about their figure how do you expect a child to be.

By that I mean believe in what you say. How did you reassure her? Do you believe in those words when looking at yourself?

If a grown up can't be confident about their figure how do you expect a child to be.

I am pretty body confident but wasn't as a teenager. I hope she doesn't spend her teenage year obsessing over imagined flaws like I did.