Will I ever fall in love?

[Riya208]

Hello,

I often wonder,

1. Will I ever fall in love?
2. Will I ever find a guy?
3. Will I have a love marriage?

I am from India, and in India arrange marriage is very common. I have a dream, and that dream is to fall in love and to be loved by someone special. Someone who is head over heels in love with me. Now, this dream may sound stupid to some of you, but that's what I hope for. I am not exactly a fairy tale kind of a person where there is "Happily forever", but I wish to find a prince charming. Whenever I read or watch a news, where somebody in love is tying a knot, my heart skips a beat and I wish to have that kind of a feeling. I want to fall in love and marry a guy, and not marry someone stranger and fall in love (arrange marriage). Though the latter isn't that bad, I don't want to have the feeling that I have married this guy, so I have to have a liking for him.

I recently had a failed (my first ever)relationship with a guy. In my previous relationship, I was the only one who fell in love. He never loved me. All in all, bad choice, wrong person, bad decision, but that's not holding me back. The problem is, I don't find guys and When I do find them I don't know how to approach them. I don't want to be the only one falling in love. I desire the feeling to be mutual. As I friends describe "I am a lovable person", but nobody ever considers me as a love interest. Like I said earlier, I had one failed so-called "relationship". I was the one to approach the guy.

None of the guys have ever approached me. Most of the times, I just feel like there isn't always "soulmates" for everybody. You meet (in case of India arrange marriage), decide to get married and live together. You develop liking for each other because you live together and not the other way around.

Readers, I don't know if I sound crazy, desperate, or you exactly understand what I am feeling right now, but I just hope to have some "talk" with you all.

Can anybody provide me with some insight on this?

Note: I am already 25 years old. The so-called marriageable age for Indian girls is 25, but since I am studying MS, I still have 2-3 years to go (max). That means I only have 2-3 years to find my "Mr Right", otherwise my story will be like any other girl's story in India, settling down for arrange marriage :'( (FYI: Some might argue, why you should go for arrange marriage? Wait for the moment. The answer to those is, it's not easy to be single and 30+ in India. There is a pressure from family and society to settle down.)

Thank you

With love.

Riya, about 50% of these 'love marriages' end in divorce at some point, so it really isn't the romantic idyll you are imagining. And there are a lot of women here who live a single life either after divorce, or never having married, so the advice here tends to be - be happy and strong as a single person, and if you meet someone to share your life with, so be it.
'Looking for love' puts you in a vulnerable position for being taken advantage of by predatory males, in any country I imagine. Don't fall in love too easily! And maybe that arranged marriage wouldn't be such a bad thing, if a young man your family found for you, seems kind, interesting, etc etc.