I have just separated from my husband

[MollyHopps]

I could really, really use a handhold.

Posted a thread under a name change asking for practical advice. After which I just broached the subject.

No idea what tomorrow will bring, what I am mean't to do. I feel so lost right now.

I didn't know it could be so hard on this side of things

Hi Molly, you have done the hardest bit by broaching the subject.
Did you have a discussion with him? What did he say?

Thank you Purple - For some reason it feels more difficult today, but you are right. I needed to take that step.

He was a bit all over the place last night. Wondered how we would tell the kids, What he would say to his parents, lots of little irrelevant questions. I will have to gauge how he is this morning but he was just in shock last night.

I don't regret doing it, but the hurt I have caused him is breaking my heart.

Be very prepared to keep having to have the same conversation. I'm still having the same conversation 3 months post separation. I'm like a broken record! I felt guilty for a long while but I was only thinking last night how relaxed and easy my life is now. I won't say good as there is still so much to sort out. But life is definitely better.

Thank you again. I am having waves of guilt, nausea, and periods of strange calm.

It actually didn't hit him until this morning. He is beside himself now; crying on and off, saying that he wish he could change himself, and that he has never felt so sad in his life. He doesn't see that he will feel better, but then neither do I to be fair.

I so desperately want to wrap him up and take all of his hurt away. He isn't horrible and nothing is wrong with him at all. It's all me and how I feel. I just wish there was some way I could make it better, easier for him.