I know it's only September but anyone else alone with their dc's this Christmas?

[cupcakesmakeyouhappy]

It's not our first year without their dad, it's actually been 5 years but each year we have managed to share Christmas with others.
This year it's just me and my 2 dc's. I feel quite sorry for them that they only have me.
I am alone quite a lot as a single parent but we keep ourselves quite busy but there is something about being alone and admitting we are alone over Christmas and the new year that makes me feel so sad. I feel more sad for my dd's.
I know there are lots of people alone, which makes me sad so don't want to come across as feeling sorry for myself just wanted to ask how you all cope/find it if you are also alone with your dc's?

Some of our best Christmas and New year were just the three of us. Eat what we want, get dressed when we want, no other rules or pressures, I look back fondly.
Always go to the cinema on boxing day and visited a museum new years eve. One new year the fireworks woke up my little one and we cuddled on the sofa with the curtains open watching them - lovely times.
Place no pressure on yourself, them or anything and just enjoy xx

I've been a single parent for over 12 years and rather enjoy Christmas alone with my children (possibly more as my ex used to ruin every happy occasion).

I don't think I do anything out of the ordinary. My favourite bit is buying tiny gifts for the stockings (have just bought the first thing!)

Gttia - thanks for the message :) Sounds lovely! Maybe I am putting too much pressure on myself. Cinema is a good idea for boxing day.
Frith- thanks for the message:) I love stocking filling too.

I don't know why I feel so sad this year. Maybe because they're older and they have friends who will be busy with families and new years parties. I dont want them to feel they dont have family. Even though they dont.

My husband has been quite ill and last yearhe ruined christmas morning it w as horrible the rest of the day was fine butthe bitwith santa andthe presents was awful. I would have loved it justto bethe two of us that day.
Getthe duvets down and watch filmseat chocolate and let them know they arethe mostloved girls intheworld xxx

Gre8 - thanks for the message :) I'm sorry to hear that. I will definitely make sure they know that :)

How about thinking of some new traditions purely for those special Xmases when it's just the three of you? My two DSDs join me for 'our' Xmas day sometime between Xmas and New Year. I'm divorced from their Dad and they adore our Xmas traditions, our tree, our lunch with the dishes no one else does. Ask them if there's anything special they'd love to make / eat / do. Make Xmas muffins together in the morning because you have time - you're not having to get a big lunch together for loads of people. Have a special morning cocktail (Buck's Fizz?) that you can do in virgin form for them. Maybe a Xmas pyjama day or silly jumpers or something. Box sets to watch, new games to play? Get little presents to open at specific times during the day. Make each other little presents that you each hide for a crafty tea time treasure hunt. Random ideas but you get the gist. I think you could have great fun planning it!

Beenthere- thanks for the message:) tbat sounds lovely and great you still have that tradition. Thankyou they're some fantastic ideas. Really appreciate them. I think I have to start planning some new traditional things for just us :)

You're welcome! I think it's really important to include them in some of the decisions (as well as keeping a surprise or two for them) and get them to buy or make things for you too so they don't feel awkward if they feel you're left out of stuff then it really does become a Three Musketeers Xmas Day. You can do Christmas paper pass-the-parcel. Take it in turns to stop the music then you all get to unwrap the parcel.

We will be on our own too, I have considered going away but have now decided to stay at home. My dd's are 11 and 13 so Christmas isn't as exciting as it used to be. We will probably stay in pj's all day and not do a lot.

I might be. I've done it twice before.

We do stockings, then parkrun, then big presents, lunch, walk, Xmas telly.

i was alone with my mum most christmas times growing up. we both had a great time together. it's what you make it. x

Beenthere - Yes, definitely. I will start planning. I feel better already :)
Love music - mine are 9 and 12. They're still super excited and making lists already. That's why I worry, because they're older and notice more. I don't want them to compare to others who have big family get togethers. Maybe I'm worrying too much. I spent many Christmas alone and pretended to others I wasn't alone. I know they have me, it's different I suppose.
Megle - park run too, you're good :)
Thanks all for messages.

Cherry- thanks :) that's nice :) glad you have nice memories. That's the main thing. I'm probably worrying for nothing.

What a lovely happy relaxed time you will have - much better than lots of people you have to feed and entertain, spend Christmas day playing games and eating sweets and plan an outing for boxing day.

cupcake I'm sure you can make it special for them, I don't think my kids compare or even care what other kids do at Christmas, I think sometimes we worry too much. My dd's no longer believe which is now a good thing as I can say 'i can't afford xxx'. I have family but they are busy over Christmas and tbh I can't be doing with family parties and would much rather be at home.

Jolly - thanks :) I haven't even thought about it in that way. I know it can be super busy for some. Thankyou:)
Lovemusic - I don't have that to compare with but never thought of it like that either. Maybe if I had the choice I wouldn't feel so sad about it. I love being home with me and my dd's on weekends. It's the whole hype about it being about family I guess. People asking what we are doing for Christmas and New year etc....
Thankyou all, feeling better already :)

I completely understand where your coming from. It's more intense over Christmas and new year for family get together s, even the adverts make you feel like you should be having a house full! Try not to worry it's over quicker than you can blink and then it's a brand new year xx

Hangup - thanks :) that's true. It's a massive lead up to the big day :) Yes that's true.

I read on MN the idea of doing a 'Twinkle Run' on Christmas Eve and driving around the neighbourhood enjoying all the Christmas trees and lights. (I would suggest doing a recci and route plan beforehand) with cheesy music on in the car. Come home to hot chocolate and marshmallows....

Chottie- thanks :) that's a lovely idea. We usually do that to the lead up. I will add the cheesy music this year :)

I don't get the description of being "alone" when there are 3 of you?

Bubbling - as in single parent. No family kind of alone.

I hate all the hype, I hate all the Christmas adverts which paint a pretty picture of how Christmas should be. I'm glad both my dd's are now t high school so we haven't got the hype of all the Christmas activities and plays. I think I always imagined having big family christmas's and everyone being happy but it's not reality. I will just enjoy a day with the dd's, relaxing, enjoying a few presents and good food whilst in pj's all day

Lovemusic - I often think of the people that are completely alone and imagine what it's like for them during the lead up/day. We are lucky we have our dd's. I feel the same about imagining family get togethers. I always here the saying focus on what we have instead of what we don't and this post and all of your messages have made me focus on what I do have. Thankyou lovemusic :) your day sounds lovely. I actually feel a little bit of excitement.

A lot of stuff is fantasy. Familues have fights, drunken parents, passive agressive mils etc . Dont look at others. Lovely ideas suggested. Your dds will be happy. Maybe get involved in a charity thing beforehand..presents for old peoples home or something.
They will take their lead from you so no apologising or comparing.