Relationship counselling??

[isitworthtrying]

Name change as a tad embarrassed to post under my usual name.

My and DP have hit a rough patch. Really lost one another. We have 2 dc 4&2. Both work and struggle to make time for each other etc. We both acknowledge there's a problem and still really love one another. He has a history of depression, and he has zero sex drive which in turn makes me feel rejected.

We both really want to save this and considering relationship counselling. Anyone else had a positive experience with it?

Thanks for reading

I have but it does take a lot of time, effort and ££. Both have to be invested to make it work and be honest. With hindsight I still don't think I was 100% open and honest and it probably has affected to a degree how things are now but we are together which to me is the most important thingS

Yes, Relate are amazing at helping you communicate with each other. It may not save your relationship - there are no guarantees - but I think the communication helps everything, even the split, if it comes to that.

I think it's worth a try. We have just started doing Relate (1st appt was yesterday). Our relationship is otherwise good, but there's been a situation arise in the wider family that has caused us a lot of stress and has affected our daughter (MIL has a partner who is a paedophile and sought to facilitate his access to our daughter, all was fine though, and he never had unsupervised contact with her and she wasn't harmed in anyway, but it's caused a massive rift in the family with various people taking sides and blaming us, etc.). So we wanted to see if relationship counselling might help us to work through our own anger and resentment about being stuck in the middle of this mess and figure out how to talk with our daughter and explain it to her (MIL no longer is allowed any sort of contact at all and has not seen her in nearly a year). No idea if it will really help. The first session mostly just opened up all the old wounds and made me feel really angry about it all again! But I'm hoping in time it will help. I think it's worth a shot, but I would decide in advance how long you are willing to carry on. It's not cheap, even though Relate is technically a 'charity.' I can't see us doing it for more than about 4 appts.

I can also recommend using Relate. It's not cheap and may not save the relationship but it will help you both communicate better and it should help you work out what the problems are.

You may find that after only a few sessions you both have the skills to work the rest out yourself.