How to process

[Sweetnsalty]

I'm internet connecting (avoiding the word dating). Chatting to nice guy. Exchanged numbers. He asked if we can chat on the phone. I've agreed (I hate speaking on the phone). He's put an updated photo on his profile. It's a bit of a naff photo (sun glasses in an inappropriate way). I really thought we were hitting it off. He's obviously keeping his options open. Why on earth wouldn't he. We've not even met yet. Why on earth am I annoyed. Someone tell me to stop being crazy. Please. How do I progress? Do I just ignore the semi-ridiculous photo and chat or do i think about it in another way?

I think internet connecting sounds funny. I'd have a chat on the phone with him and then decide. Could just be a bad photo choice.

You're bananas . Roll with it. Most online er connectors keep chatting to a variety of people.

If he's put you off, he's put you off, tho. Keep fishing.

Online dating means nothing's real until you've met. It is totally and utterly normal to keep your profile active and updated while chatting to people. It's normal to chat to several people at once. It's not game playing or anything, it's just how it goes and you can assume everyone is doing it. Which also means you're welcome to do it too.

Sorry I just realised the other part of your post, you definitely can't hold it against him that he put a different photo on as you haven't even been out on a date yet. (Also could it maybe be so you could see it?)

It does sound funny. But it's not really my point . It's definitely, in my opinion, a bad photo choice. I'm not sure I would have chatted to him if I had seen it initially. I'm not very experienced with internet dating. I'm not really sure of the etiquette. I guess all I can do is just take it one step at a time. Ps. He does tick all of my boxes. Except the silly photo.

Ok. That's why I posted here. I'm chilling the feck out.

Say "what's with the silly photo?" Maybe his reply will amuse you.

It's not sunglasses balanced on his willy it is?

. No. Clearly him trying to be cool. I don't think he is. It feels very incongruent. I actually like him in all of his other photos.

What was wring with the sunglass photo? Weee they perched on his willy?

I don't want him to be something he's not.

How funny that everyone thinks they're on his willy . No!!! Just wearing them in a place where there would be no sun

His bum?

. No!! His face. The photo is just odd. Like he's trying to be a cool twenty something when he's nearly fifty.

And his other photos are lovely. And not odd.

And I like him and would rather he wasn't odd

Maybe he's being ironic.

Category you're not helping

You're thinking way too much about this. You said in your first post you're doing 'internet connecting not dating'. But you ARE acting as though you are dating, and you haven't even met this bloke.

Meet up with him sharpish and you'll figure out if he's weird or uncool or whatever.

In future don't invest any time in chatting to people online or on the phone until you've met them in real life at least once, preferably twice. It's supposed to be about making connections, not starting up the relationship already on a virtual basis. So make the connection, meet the person, if they are naff and you don't get on you'll know. Meet up with them again to see if you have a good time. Then you can start chatting online and worrying about profile pictures :o

Thanks Bertie. I totally agree. I absolutely hate investing in chatting online or the phone. I don't believe there's any substitute for face to face. I'll call him tomorrow and suggest a meet. Then decide.

Does he normally wear glasses? Maybe he has photochromatic lenses that darken by themselves? Could he have just walked in from outside (if the photo is inside) and they hadn't returned to normal yet...?

Any half decent bloke will be chatting to 5-10 people at once when internet dating/connecting. Your call a meet strategy is a good call.
Good luck

I also thought the shades were on his cock as well! Glad you clarified that