I feel ridiculous writing this, but as it's a first relationship after leaving a long, abusive marriage, I need help please to make sense of what's going on.
Met my boyfriend online 3 1/2 months ago. He's been divorced 5 years, much longer than me. We both have DC. I fell for him early on and when he said, 2 weeks ago, that he was falling in love with me, I was quick to jump in and tell him I loved him. And I do. But l don't think he was quite there in his feelings and when he reciprocated (and has done since, he never says it first) it feels like he's saying it because he should.
Yesterday we were both a bit drunk and I stupidly asked him if he loved me as much as I loved him. He said "I know you love me, I'm well aware of it, but it's a difficult question for me to answer" and then went back over how hurt he was by his marriage breakup and how he no longer believes in finding a partner for life.
However in our (otherwise sober) life, he has introduced me to everyone in his world, talked about a future, and is physically very loving.
I on the other hand haven't introduced him to anyone or integrated any part of my life with his, out of fear of being pinned down. And yet I love this man.
However we only see each other once a week, usually late Saturday to Sunday morning, because of childcare commitments, which doesn't feel like much. We text in between and never talk, which I don't mind, however texts are far fewer since "love" came up.
Are we just two commitment phones or am I back in the position I was in when I was married - of loving someone who couldn't or wouldn't love me back?