Boyf friends with ex

[Aloevera1]

My partner is 50 and I've been in a relationship with him for 4 years. Before me, he was in an 11 year relationship which he ended, a year before meeting me. Despite splitting up, he and his ex became best friends, often having dinner together, going out together, museums etc. They hadn't slept together, he says, for a few years but he moved out because she was a nag. I'm not sure if I'm being unreasonable, but I just don't like her. If we meet up with her she brings up holidays they had and mutual friends I don't know. Also when arranging meeting up, she always contacts him, not me, to arrange. She hasn't met anyone else in the time we've been together and I just feel weird about it all. Am I being unreasonable?

I would never date a man who ended a relationship with a woman for being a 'nag'. The implication is that a) he's a sexist arsehole and b) he didn't pull his weight.

Is it her that you don't like or them together? How does your partner behave when they're together?

Sorry but I wouldn't like this. Nothing wrong with remaining friends with an ex (although not something I could do) but actually spending a lot of time with them is something else. I'd wonder why he felt the need to remain friends. She sounds like she might be needy and is clinging on to him.

Maybe you could just refuse to spend time with her and tell him if he wants to see her, he does so alone. That way you don't have to listen to her bringing up holidays etc. Its up to you who you spend time with.

Do you worry that something might happen between them?

It's weird to be going out to dinner with an ex often, especially when with someone else. I think they are both not over each other really, her especially, maybe he just likes the attention from two women? I dunno, it's weird, I wouldn't put up with it.

A nag?

So that translates as he was a lazy sexist arsehole who spent their relationship failing to deliver on promises or pull his weight, then?

Why don't you dump him and make friends with her instead?!

they hadn't slept together for a few years and nag are huge red flags for me. I read emails between XH and OW were she was commiserating with him for being in a sexless loveless relationship. I don't who that was with but he was definitely shagging me all through their affair.

Just so I understand this he has dinner with her, goes to museum exhibitions with her and practically dates her and leaves you at home? I just think they're having an affair to be honest.

FWIW I never have a second date with a man who bad mouths his ex and I never believe the no sex tosh from a bloke either when it's trotted out.

One of them (at least) still has feelings for the other one.